Wisconsin Rapids Bro League
Our ninth official season of blaming Cole Walters for spreading the coronavirus.
Bro...
Week six of the NFL season wasn't just a shockingly boring week of NFL football in which only the Dolphins and Jaguars topped 30 points out of the 30 teams in action but, it was also a shockingly non-competitive, relatively drama-free WRBL week as well. Despite the avalanche of injuries to quarterbacks and other star players, there's little to discuss other than to preview the upcoming week, which is why I attached the betting lines to this week's NFL schedule for those interested on staking their claims on friendly wagers or whatever keeps you glued to these games after a week that had me debating whether or not to turn off the RedZone Channel of all things. It's getting to be spooky season and with that comes NBA preseason hype so if nobody minds, I'd like to make some picks in an impromptu NBA preview that at least gives me some excuse for why I spent the past week ranking all 30 NBA team's rosters in order of likely playing time so that I could get something of a closer grasp on what to expect before the tanking and turnover begins. At least, that's what I'm going to do to validate my Asperger's-like annual routine of sifting through preseason hypothetical lineups.
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| Tyson Bagent (left) v. Brian Hoyer (right) highlights an upcoming week 7 featuring just 26 NFL teams in "action". |
Andy Todd's 2023-24 NBA PreviewLink to the doc with every roster's current Top 15 players. (* = rookies)
Western Conference Picks
1. Denver Nuggets (Western Conference Champions)
2. Phoenix Suns
3. Sacramento Kings
4. Golden State Warriors
5. Los Angeles Lakers
6. New Orleans Pelicans
7. Minnesota Timberwolves
8. Oklahoma City Thunder
9. Los Angeles Clippers (up to 6th if Harden acquired)
10. Memphis Grizzlies
11. Utah Jazz
12. Dallas Mavericks
13. Houston Rockets
14. San Antonio Spurs
15. Portland Trail Blazers
Eastern Conference
1. Milwaukee Bucks
2. Boston Celtics (Eastern Conference Champions)
3. Miami Heat
4. Philadelphia 76ers (5th without Harden)
5. New York Knicks
6. Cleveland Cavaliers
7. Orlando Magic
8. Atlanta Hawks
9. Indiana Pacers
10. Detroit Pistons
11. Brooklyn Nets
12. Chicago Bulls
13. Toronto Raptors
14. Charlotte Hornets
15. Washington Wizards
Even though I might not be out here stating all of those with the confidence of having my chest puffed out, I think it should be pretty self-explanatory how I have the over/unders shaping out for each team...
Over - Atlanta (41.5), Boston (54.5), Denver (52.5), Detroit (27.5), Golden State (47.5), Houston (31.5), Indiana (38.5), LA Lakers (46.5), Miami (44.5), Milwaukee (53.5), Minnesota (44.5), New Orleans (44.5), New York (45.5), Oklahoma City (44.5), Orlando (37.5), Phoenix (52.5), Sacramento (44.5), Utah (35.5)
Under - Brooklyn (37.5), Charlotte (31.5), Chicago (37.5), Cleveland (50.5), Dallas (43.5), LA Clippers (45.5), Memphis (45.5), Philadelphia (47.5), Portland (27.5), San Antonio (28.5), Toronto (36.5), Washington (23.5)
Awards
MVP: Giannis Antetokounmpo (Bucks)
Rookie OTY: Victor Wembanyama (Spurs)
6th Man: Bogdan Bogdanovic' (Hawks)
Most Improved: Franz Wagner (Magic)
Defensive POTY: Herb Jones (Pelicans)
Coach OTY: Jamahl Mosley (Magic)
Finals: Celtics over Nuggets in 7
Finals MVP: Jayson Tatum (Celtics)
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Eric Hartline - USA TODAY Sports
I don't feel great about it (Denver, Phoenix, Milwaukee and Miami are all looming) but I'm picking Boston to win the finals with the idea being Jrue Holiday keeping the ball out of Jaylen Brown's hands on occasion. |
Final thoughts on each team headed into '23-'24 season
Atlanta - Not even a coaching change (29-30 with Nate McMillan, 2-0 with interim Joe Prunty & 10-11 with Quin Snyder) can change this mediocre team's fortunes as a play-in team. They're just as deep as the 2021 Eastern conference finalists but time is running out on Trae Young's deficiencies.
Boston - I loved the Jrue Holiday addition and still really like Kristaps Porzingis when healthy. Oshae Brissett is the wildcard as the trade for Holiday (giving up Robert Williams III) leaves them a body short when guarding Giannis once Al Horford realizes he's 87 years old. I expect them to land a veteran buyout character or trade candidate around the deadline (Jakob Poltl? Drew Eubanks? JaVale McGee?).
Brooklyn - Nobody is rooting against the Nets now that they've dumped every primadonna in favor of a likable trio of Mikal Bridges-Cameron Johnson-Nic Claxton. Oh wait, Ben Simmons is still there? Well, he should at least feel less pressure with this team having no outward expectations as they took not falling into the play-in as a W for the 2022-23 season.
Charlotte - Bringing back Miles Bridges turned out to be a huge error in judgement and I have no interest in ranking him as if he'll ever play for this team because we just don't know. Their over/under of 31.5 undersells how talented LaMelo Ball is but, so does the rest of the team that Mitch Kupchak and now-former majority owner Michael Jordan built around the face of Big Baller Brand.
Chicago - The Bulls are back? Yawn. This core has no juice whatsoever and I can't wait until they start to sell off the DeRozan and LaVine duo for picks. DeMar DeRozan deserves to be on a contender (Watch out if Toronto overachieves or it the Clippers don't land James Harden) one more time before he starts to fall off and I don't see Billy Donavan or owner Jerry Reinsdorf exceeding expectations when Donavan hasn't had a noteworthy playoff run since his first year in OKC and Reinsdorf has ruined the White Sox.
Cleveland - 50.5 just seems generous even though this team SHOULD be that good. Either Donovan Mitchell leaves at the end of the year and Evan Mobley is forced to become an All-star or Max Strus is more than just a plug-and-play three-and-D character and this team shocks the world with an ECF run. Despite the 2016 title, this is still Cleveland and I'm betting on the former.
Dallas - Kyrie Irving has yet to play on any kind of team that hasn't let America down without LeBron James carrying him and a bevvy of defensive minded guards covering his most glaring weakness as a player. Luka Doncic' is going to hate playing with this galaxy-brained point guard if he hasn't already decided that this isn't for him. I don't know why Dallas hasn't been able to land better sidepieces to their MVP candidate but, they are totally bordering on losing him in the coming years.
Denver - Nikola Jokic' might be the new Tim Duncan but with way better passing and less consistent defense. Nobody besides real NBA nerds tune in to see this guy and the rest of the lineup is so well balanced and equally young that there is very real dynasty potential here.
Detroit - New head coach Monty Williams is perhaps the perfect mentor to the eight lottery picks littering this roster (seven of them young, sorry Alec Burks). The biggest reason the Pistons went 17-65 last season wasn't lack of talent so much as it was disorder between the midseason addition of James Wiseman and the 66 games lost to injury by 2021 #1 pick Cade Cunningham. Returning their best player will help them not be the worst team in the NBA at the very least and in the play-in at best.
Golden State - The addition of Chris Paul to a bench that needed a Chris Paul would give him a lock as sixth man of the year if he weren't 38 years old. The Warriors aren't getting any younger but, Steph, Klay and Draymond remain so all should be well in the Bay Area.
Houston - The Stephen Silas era was a bust as was the Kevin Porter Jr. era (dealt for Jeremiah Robinson-Earl and headache relief). Now, the Rockets splurged on a couple of veterans for mentorship (Fred VanVleet) and results (Reggie Bullock and Dillon Brooks) as they try to get Alperen Sengun, Jabari Smith Jr. and Jalen Green to join VanVleet's tier of stardom.
Indiana - Somehow, Myles Turner and Buddy Hield still remain. I'm not in love with a roster that is always considering dealing their third-best player but, Tyrese Haliburton can lowkey carry a team to 35 wins and there's always the possibility that Bennedict Mathurin improves his game around JUST scoring 17 points a game.
LA Clippers - Without James Harden, I'm afraid Ty Lue is in his final year as a Clipper with both of his stars unable to take the court at the same time consistently and late in their primes. Russell Westbrook cannot be as important to a serious title contender as he is to this team. Clippers gonna clip.
LA Lakers - I love taking chances on young athletes that seemingly just found themselves in the wrong environments to start off their careers. Now Jaxson Hayes, Rui Hachimura and perhaps even Jarred Vanderbilt get a full season in la la land to build themselves up through more playing time so that they might exceed the potential of players they were previously held down by (think Larry Nance Jr., Deni Avdija and Jaden McDaniels for example). Add in the wildcard veteran experience of Christian Wood and Gabe Vincent and you have just enough threats around LeBron and AD to part the seas for the Austin Reaves breakout season. The Cam Reddish discourse will be entertaining.
Memphis - The 25-game Ja Morant suspension has experts loving the under on this year's regular season Grizzlies success and I'm hopping on that very same bandwagon. Derrick Rose and Marcus Smart aren't enough to make up for the modern Allen Iverson spending a quarter of the season at home. Also, for as pathetic and awful as his postseason run may have been, Dillon Brooks mattered and his banishment from this roster may have been a much needed locker room cleanse but, it will take time for them to adjust.
Miami - The Heat feed on underestimations and it would be so very Heat of them to go from the 8th-seed in the Finals to the play-in team that added very little, lost plenty of playoff rotation members and got the three-seed. Sleep on a team being coached by Erik Spoelstra at your own risk.
Milwaukee - Plenty has been said in recent weeks in anticipation of the "Freak Time" pick-and-roll and yeah, that's exciting as hell. I'm more interested in Khris Middleton getting open looks, MarJon Beauchamp potentially developing into a real role player and how Cam Payne and Malik Beasley replace Grayson Allen and Wes Matthews. Those will be the things that decide whether or not this team is capable of a second title in four years.
Minnesota - The Timberwolves will win the first ever in-season tournament. I don't have any reasoning behind this pick outside of seeming like the perfect time for Anthony Edwards to go on a scorching two-week stretch mid-winter where he looks like Michael Jordan.
New Orleans - We're due for a healthy Zion Williamson season that sees him play 65+ games. If that is indeed the case, the Pelicans are at least a 7-seed and their goal should be to positively avoid the play-in tournament. There is too much talent smothered all over this roster for them to completely flop.
New York - Perhaps 2021-22 was the blip on the moderate success that has been the Julius Randle era. Perhaps this is the end of the Julius Randle era. Jalen Brunson is clearly the better player at the moment and replacing Alec Burks with Donte DiVincenzo just sort of reinforces the Knicks desire to speed things up a bit instead of letting the team slog it out with Randle, Mitchell Robinson and a series of defensive players.
Orlando - Let me be the first to start the 2023-24 Orlando Magic bandwagon. Slightly less believable than my "Play-In Pistons" pick on account of Detroit undergoing the face-lift of adding a respected head coach and getting their #1 pick back from injury, Orlando is just me rolling the dice on the weaker conference having a surprise team pull themselves up by riding the maturation of lottery talents like 2022 #1 pick Paolo Banchero and 2021 #8 pick Franz Wagner (my Most Improved Player of 2023-24) to a play-in appearance at worst.
Philadelphia - Everybody knows that they have to deal James Harden. Either they trade the guy for 75 cents or lower to their dollar and are a competitive playoff team that's not quite a conference finalist or they keep him, are miserable, suffer a similar or lesser fate to last season's team (2nd round exit) and he leaves afterwards for nothing. Kelly Oubre Jr. doesn't have much experience on super successful teams but, a 20 point a game scorer is still a 20 point a game scorer and something tells me they'll be fine without Harden despite the complete overhaul that may have on new coach Nick Nurse's offensive gameplan since Oubre can get a bucket too.
Phoenix - Maybe the last superteam made in a few month span through multiple trades (Durant from Brooklyn at the deadline, Beal from Washington in Summer). The creation of a big 3 of Devin Booker, Kevin Durant and Bradley Beal usurped any semblance of depth for the Suns and they had to Frankenstein a bench together overnight. Will Bol Bol, Grayson Allen and Eric Gordon save this team from a postseason flop? I wouldn't say this is the same team of role guys we'll see come May 2024, especially when this could be the last season or two where Kevin Durant is KEVIN DURANT. New owner Mat Ishbia will not hesitate to pull the plug on players that aren't working out alongside the big 3 (see: DeAndre Ayton).
Portland - The worst roster of names even casual NBA fans have heard of. There's too many positional conflicts here like DeAndre Ayton and Robert "Time Lord" Williams III or Matisse Thybulle and rookie Kris Murray that they should be overactive come deadline time. If they can get something for the reigning Sixth Man of the Year Malcolm Brogdon and losing his mentorship doesn't turn Scoot Henderson into a pumpkin, they should do it. I want this team to land the #1 pick in the 2024 draft and take some of the possessions out of Scoot and Shaedon Sharpe's hands because their shooting percentages will suffer this season.
Sacramento - They probably won't look as fast as they did in their breakthrough 2022-23 season. With that said, I'm buying the results as repeatable and replacing some underwhelming bench mob guys like Richaun Holmes and moving Alex Len down the rotation for JaVale McGee, an overseas transfer in Sasha Vezenkov and a new reclamation project guard in Chris Duarte' should actually keep them from blowing big games and coming up short in the postseason.
San Antonio - WEMBY!
Toronto - Nick Nurse and Fred VanVleet are gone for better and for worse. The better being that hopefully new coach Darko Rajakovic' can better use or at least better grow his bench pieces into usable assets considering how exhausted the Raptors were by the end of last season. The worse being that Dennis Schroder and Gary Trent Jr. might be the worst starting guard combination in the NBA? They at least have the lowest ceiling of all guard duos and that should be enough to keep this team from the postseason. Maybe OG Anunoby gets dealt.
Utah - Can Lauri Markkanen and the most surprising non-embarrassment of a 2022-23 team build off last season's "success"? My assumption is that three first-rounders in addition to too many other moving parts will keep them out of a stacked western conference's play-in tournament. I'm also not sure how John Collins fits into all of this but, maybe they just acquired him from Atlanta to build him up and get more first round picks in February.
Washington - Maybe the worst roster in the NBA in execution compared to Portland's worst on paper roster. Kuzma and Poole being the big two will be the worst fate for any Wizard fans that want to believe in just nonstop scoring without spending a minute of their focus on defense. I'd still love to see Deni Avdija or more likely Corey Kispert become actual difference makers in the NBA but Wes Unseld Jr. has a long season ahead of him relying on Avdija and Daniel Gafford to make all(?) of the stops. Hopefully, they give Bilal Coulibaly some experimental minutes that can help the surprising french lottery pick in the long run.
Back to football next week...
Official WRBL Standings
Steven Nett Division
Colieveland 96ers (Cole Walters) 5-1 W4 (797.34)
LIVE.LAUGH.OLAVE. (Nathaniel Hoefs) 4-2 W2 (878.62)
Stoltzya's Electric Orcas (Gabe Stoltz) 3-3 L1 (641.3)
Dad Weights and Protein Shakes (Jaime Sparkes AKA: Sparky) 2-4 L3 (642.12)
Shooter McGavin Division
Lord Pretty Flacco Joey (Andy Todd) 3-3 L2 (718.26)
Scott's Many Endeavors (Nick Zurawski) 3-3 W1 (820.84)
Tax Paying Homeowner (Alec Swanson) 2-4 W1 (762.78)
Jordan Addison's Dog (Brett Weinfurter) 2-4 L1 (707.92)
Week Six Final Scores
HOEFS defeats ANDY 156.52-101.34
NICK defeats GABE 129.6-108.24
BRETT defeats ALEC 120.88-90.02
COLE defeats SPARKY 134.36-94.24
Heroes of the Week: RB Raheem Mostert (34.2, Hoefs), WR Amon-Ra St. Brown (30.4, Andy), WR Adam Thielen (28.5, Hoefs)
Waiver Wonders: QB Jared Goff (22.42), DF Minnesota Vikings (20), WR Kendrick Bourne (19.3)
Benchwarmers of the Week: QB Dak Prescott (24.88, Hoefs), QB Tua Tagovailoa (22.48, Nick), WR Drake London (21.5, Gabe)
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Chris O'Meara/AP
Waiver Wonder: QB Jared Goff (353 yards + 2 TDs) |
Upcoming Week 7 Schedule for both WRBL and NFL (in CST)
BRETT v. NICK
GABE v. ANDY
COLE v. ALEC
HOEFS v. SPARKY
Thursday @ 7:15 PM: Jacksonville @ New Orleans (-2.5)
Sunday @ NOON: Detroit @ Baltimore (-3)
Atlanta @ Tampa Bay (-2.5)
Cleveland (-2.5) @ Indianapolis
Buffalo (-8.5) @ New England
Washington (-2.5) @ NY Giants
Las Vegas (-3) @ Chicago
Sunday @ 3:05 PM: Pittsburgh @ LA Rams (-3)
Arizona @ Seattle (-7.5)
Sunday @ 3:25 PM: LA Chargers @ Kansas City (-5.5)
Green Bay (-1) @ Denver
Sunday @ 7:20 PM: Miami @ Philadelphia (-2.5)
Monday @ 7:15 PM: San Francisco (-7) @ Minnesota
BYES: Dallas Cowboys, Cincinnati Bengals, New York Jets, Tennessee Titans, Houston Texans & Carolina Panthers
Scoring Leaders
QB
Josh Allen 132.14 (Cole)
Jalen Hurts 128.98 (Nick)
Patrick Mahomes 116.22 (Sparky)
Justin Herbert 114.88 (Alec)
Lamar Jackson 112.82 (Brett)
Justin Fields 95.08 (Hoefs)
Trevor Lawrence 88.26 (Andy)
Kirk Cousins 63.84 (Gabe)
Joe Burrow 18.56 (Gabe)
Dak Prescott 14.36 (Hoefs)
C.J. Stroud 14.16 (Alec)
RB
Christian McCaffrey 148 (Alec)
Travis Etienne 115.3 (Cole)
Bijan Robinson 95 (Andy)
Tony Pollard 91.6 (Cole)
Josh Jacobs 89.1 (Brett)
Isiah Pacheco 77.8 (Gabe)
Joe Mixon 69 (Nick)
Derrick Henry 67.98 (Hoefs)
Kyren Williams 65.7 (Alec)
Kenneth Walker 62.4 (Cole)
Alexander Mattison 57.8 (Nick)
Rachaad White 53 (Andy)
Saquon Barkley 50.3 (Gabe)
James Cook 47.8 (Hoefs)
James Conner 47.4 (Gabe)
Rhamondre Stevenson 43.1 (Brett)
Jahmyr Gibbs 38.9 (Sparky)
Austin Ekeler 36.6 (Gabe)
Alvin Kamara 36.1 (Hoefs)
Raheem Mostert 34.2 (Hoefs)
Aaron Jones 29.1 (Sparky)
Breece Hall 28.4 (Andy)
David Montgomery 25.2 (Brett)
Miles Sanders 23.4 (Nick)
Nick Chubb 23.1 (Nick)
De'Von Achane 21.5 (Nick)
Zack Moss 17.9 (Sparky)
D'Andre Swift 17.8 (Alec)
Jaylen Warren 10.9 (Gabe)
A.J. Dillon 10.6 (Sparky)
Najee Harris 10.6 (Alec)
Jerome Ford 9.5 (Andy)
Javonte Williams 7.8 (Cole)
Dameon Pierce 6.7 (Hoefs)
Jonathan Taylor 4.4 (Nick)
Dalvin Cook 4.7 (Sparky)
WR
Tyreek Hill 150.8 (Hoefs)
Stefon Diggs 139 (Cole)
Keenan Allen 124.46 (Nick)
Ja'Marr Chase 123.8 (Brett)
A.J. Brown 121.2 (Hoefs)
Justin Jefferson 109.1 (Sparky)
Davante Adams 104.1 (Alec)
Amon-Ra St. Brown 99.9 (Andy)
CeeDee Lamb 89.6 (Sparky)
Calvin Ridley 75.3 (Andy)
Mike Evans 73.6 (Andy)
DeVonta Smith 73.4 (Gabe)
Puka Nacua 70.2 (Nick)
Jaylen Waddle 65.4 (Cole)
Michael Pittman Jr. 64.9 (Brett)
DeAndre Hopkins 64.6 (Sparky)
Chris Olave 62.8 (Hoefs)
DK Metcalf 56.8 (Alec)
Deebo Samuel 49.6 (Brett)
Chris Godwin 48.5 (Gabe)
Cooper Kupp 47.6 (Nick)
Brandon Aiyuk 37.9 (Alec)
Amari Cooper 33.9 (Gabe)
Garrett Wilson 30.7 (Brett)
Zay Flowers 29.4 (Gabe)
Tyler Lockett 28.9 (Nick)
Adam Thielen 28.5 (Hoefs)
Jordan Addison 18.4 (Andy)
Marquise Brown 16.1 (Andy)
D.J. Moore 14.6 (Alec)
Terry McLaurin 8.9 (Alec)
Jaxon Smith-Njigba 8.8 (Sparky)
Nico Collins 6.9 (Cole)
Tee Higgins 4.1 (Cole)
TE
Travis Kelce 88.6 (Nick)
T.J. Hockenson 76.4 (Alec)
Mark Andrews 71.4 (Andy)
Evan Engram 66.1 (Hoefs)
George Kittle 57.6 (Sparky)
Dallas Goedert 56.7 (Gabe)
Sam LaPorta 51.7 (Cole)
David Njoku 27.8 (Brett)
Darren Waller 25.9 (Brett)
Tyler Higbee 7.9 (Nick)
Pat Freiermuth 7.3 (Cole)
Kyle Pitts 6.4 (Andy)
Luke Musgrave 4.5 (Cole)
Zach Ertz 4.2 (Cole)
K
Jake Elliott 70 (Hoefs)
Harrison Butker 63 (Alec)
Tyler Bass 52 (Cole)
Evan McPherson 49 (Nick)
Justin Tucker 48 (Sparky)
Younghoe Koo 39 (Andy)
Riley Patterson 38 (Brett)
Daniel Carlson 35 (Gabe)
Greg Zuerlein 11 (Brett)
DF
Dallas Cowboys 71 (Nick)
Buffalo Bills 66 (Brett)
New York Jets 59 (Gabe)
Pittsburgh Steelers 56 (Hoefs)
San Francisco 49ers 47 (Sparky)
Philadelphia Eagles 44 (Andy)
Miami Dolphins 30 (Alec)
Denver Broncos 25 (Cole)
Minnesota Vikings 20 (Cole)
Baltimore Ravens 11 (Hoefs)
New England Patriots 8 (Cole)
Atlanta Falcons 5 (Nick)
Hypothetical Standings (Top 4 scorers win, bottom 4 lose, no divisions)
Live.Laugh.Olave. 5-1
Scott's Many Endeavors 5-1
Colieveland 96ers 5-1
Tax Paying Homeowner 4-2
Jordan Addison's Dog 2-4
Lord Pretty Flacco Joey 2-4
Dad Weights And Protein Shakes 1-5
Stoltzya's Electric Orcas 0-6
