Monday, December 31, 2018

Andy Todd's Top 20 Albums of 2018

Here are my grades for the 243 new albums I listened to in 2018, followed by my official Top 20 Albums of 2018.

KEY: Artist/Band - Album Title Grade (Date Released)

TL;DR - Just CTRL+f on your keyboard (if viewing on computer/laptop) and you'll be able to find whatever album it is that you are looking for.

A-
Rejjie Snow - Dear Annie (2/16)
Rich Brian - Amen (2/2)
Nao - Saturn (10/26)
Kids See Ghosts (Kanye West & Kid Cudi) - Kids See Ghosts (6/8)
Let’s Eat Grandma - I’m All Ears (6/29)
Lil Wayne - Tha Carter V (9/28)
Ryan Beatty - Boy In Jeans (7/20)
J. Cole - KOD (4/20)
The Go! Team - Semicircle (1/19)
Tune-Yards - I Can Feel You Creep Into My Private Life (1/19)
Courtney Barnett - Tell Me How You Really Feel (5/18)
Choker - Honeymoon (8/3)
Robyn - Honey (10/26)
Estelle - Lovers Rock (9/7)
Christina Aguilera - Liberation (6/15)
Kanye West - Ye (6/1)
Kimbra - Primal Heart (4/20)
Dirty Projectors - Lamp Lit Prose (7/13)

B+
Lori McKenna - The Tree (7/20)
The Beths - Future Me Hates Me (8/10)
MØ - Forever Neverland (10/19)
Florence + The Machine - High As Hope (6/29)
Kali Uchis - Isolation (4/6)
Hookworms - Microshift (2/2)
Joji - Ballads 1 (10/26)
Jay Rock - Redemption (6/15)
JMSN - Velvet (9/21)
MGMT - Little Dark Age (2/9)
Teyana Taylor - K.T.S.E. (6/22)
Brockhampton - Iridescence (9/21)
Chvrches - Love Is Dead (5/25)
Kurt Vile - Bottle It In (10/12)
Wet - Still Run (7/13)
Confidence Man - Confident Music For Confident People (4/13)
Travis Scott - Astroworld (8/3)
Alessia Cara - The Pains Of Growing (11/30)
H.E.R. - H.E.R. (3/30)
The Carters (Beyonce’ & Jay Z) - Everything Is Love (6/16)
Mariah Carey - Caution (11/16)
Greta Van Fleet - Anthem Of The Peaceful Army (10/19)
Ariana Grande - Sweetener (8/17)
Action Bronson - White Bronco (11/2)
U.S. Girls - In A Poem Unlimited (2/16)
Denzel Curry - TA13OO (7/27)
Dessa - Chime (2/23)
Foxing - Nearer My God (8/10)
Eminem - Kamikaze (8/31)
Charlie Puth - Voicenotes (5/11)
Santigold - I Don’t Want: The Gold Fire Sessions (7/27)

B
Devon Welsh - Dream Songs (8/24)
Mac Miller - Swimming (8/3)
Phosphorescent - C’est La Vie (10/1)
Nas - Nasir (6/15)
Lucy Dacus - Historian (3/2)
Mitski - Be The Cowboy (8/17)
Meg Myers - Take Me To The Disco (7/20)
Albert Hammond Jr. - Francis Trouble (3/9)
Leon Bridges - Good Thing (5/4)
Buddy - Harlan & Alondra (7/20)
Benny Blanco - Friends Keep Secrets (12/7)
The Voidz - Virtue (3/30)
Leikeli47 - Acrylic (11/14)
Death Cab For Cutie - Thank You For Today (8/17)
J.I.D. - DiCaprio 2 (11/26)
Laura Veirs - The Lookout (4/13)
Logic - YSIV (8/31)
Marian Hill - Unusual (5/11)
Pinegrove - Skylight (9/28)
Chromeo - Head Over Heels (6/15)
Neko Case - Hell-On (6/1)
Vance Joy - Nation Of Two (2/23)
Parquet Courts - Wide Awake (5/18)
Mountain Man - Magic Ship (9/21)
Vince Staples - FM! (11/2)
Dashboard Confessional - Crooked Shadows (2/9)
First Aid Kit - Ruins (1/19)
Saba - Care For Me (4/6)
Sobs - Telltale Signs (6/22)
Bas - Milky Way (8/24)
Noname - Room 25 (9/14)
Empress Of - Us (10/19)
Chloe x Halle - The Kids Are Alright (3/23)
Camila Cabello - Camila (1/12)
Natalie Prass - The Future And The Past (6/1)
Meek Mill - Championships (11/30)
Blood Orange - Negro Swan (8/24)
S. Carey - Hundred Acres (2/23)
Nicki Minaj - Queen (8/10)
The Neighbourhood - The Neighbourhood (3/9)
Cupcakke - Ephorize (1/5) 
Shawn Mendes - Shawn Mendes (5/25)
The O’My’s - Tomorrow (9/7)
Creed II: The Album - Various Artists (11/16)
Video Age - Pop Therapy (6/15)

B-
Brandi Carlile - By The Way, I Forgive You (2/16)
Ezra Furman - Transangelic Exodus (2/9)
Hayley Kiyoko - Expectations (3/30)
A$AP Rocky - Testing (5/25)
Twin Shadow - Caer (4/27)
James Bay - Electric Light (5/18)
Jim James - Uniform Distortion (6/29)
Justin Timberlake - Man Of The Woods (2/2)
The Decemberists - I’ll Be Your Girl (3/17)
88Rising - Head In The Clouds (7/20)
Ella Mai - Ella Mai (10/12)
The Wombats - Beautiful People Will Ruin Your Life (2/9)
Jack White - Boarding House Reach (3/23)
Shy Boys - Bell House (8/3)
Lord Huron - Vide Noir (4/20)
Honne - Love Me/Love Me Not (8/24)
Wussy - What Heaven Is Like (5/18)
Franz Ferdinand - Always Ascending (2/9)
Jeff Tweedy - Warm (11/30)
Bishop Briggs - Church Of Scars (4/20)
KT Tunstall - Wax (10/5)
Snow Patrol - Wildness (5/25)
6lack - East Atlanta Love Letter (9/14)
Peter Bjorn and John - Darker Days (10/19)
Lauv - I Met You When I Was 18. (The Playlist) (6/1)
Harry Hudson - Yesterday’s Tomorrow Night (3/30)
Lykke Li - So Sad So Sexy (6/8)
Twenty One Pilots - Trench (10/5)
Snail Mail - Lush (6/8)
Mumford & Sons - Delta (11/16)
Logic - Bobby Tarantino 2 (3/9)
The Internet - Hive Mind (7/20)
Cloud Nothings - Last Building Burning (10/19)
Atmosphere - Mi Vida Local (10/5)
Wye Oak - The Louder I Call, The Faster It Runs (4/6)

C+
LANY - Malibu Nights (10/5)
Kacey Musgraves - Golden Hour (3/30)
Tove Styrke - Sway (5/4)
Paul McCartney - Egypt Station (9/7)
The Vaccines - Combat Sports (3/30)
Various Artists - Superfly Soundtrack (6/8)
Trampled By Turtles - Life Is Good On The Open Road (5/4)
Bea Miller - Aurora (2/23)
Lily Allen - No Shame (6/8)
Lovelytheband - finding it hard to smile (8/3)
David Byrne - American Utopia (3/9)
The Ting Tings - The Black Light (10/26)
Clean Bandit - What Is Love? (11/30)
Hippo Campus - Bambi (9/28)
Damien Jurado - The Horizon Just Laughed (7/6)
Rae Sremmurd - SR3MM (5/4)
Migos - Culture 2 (1/26)
Neneh Cherry - Broken Politics (10/19)
Han Solo - album1 (9/21)
Dreamgirl - Dreamgirl (1/1)
Pale Waves - My Mind Makes Noises (9/14)
Mikky Ekko - FAME (11/2)
Gorillaz - The Now Now (6/29)
Jess Glynne - Always In Between (10/12)
Wild Nothing - Indigo (8/31)
Unknown Mortal Orchestra - Sex & Food (4/6)
Stephen Malkmus & The Jicks - Sparkle Hard (5/18)
Børns - Blue Madonna (1/12)
Amen Dunes - Freedom (3/30)
Holly Miranda - Mutual Horse (2/23)
La Luz - Floating Features (5/11)
Lil Yachty - Nuthin’ To Prove (10/19)

C
Takeoff - The Last Rocket (11/2)
The Kooks - Let’s Go Sunshine (8/31)
Trippie Redd - Life’s A Trip (8/10)
Lil Xan - Total Xanarchy (4/6)
Belly - Dove (5/4)
Nipsey Hussle - Victory Lap (2/16)
Cardi B - Invasion Of Privacy (4/6)
Amy Shark - Love Monster (7/13)
Interpol - Marauder (8/24)
Ben Howard - Noonday Dream (6/1)
Tinashe - Joyride (4/13)
Flatbush Zombies - Vacation In Hell (4/6)
Frank Turner - Be More Kind (5/4)
Young Thug - Slime Language (8/17)
Zayn - Icarus Falls (12/7)
Eleanor Friedberger - Rebound (5/4)
George Ezra - Staying At Tamara’s (3/23)
Metro Boomin’ - Not All Heroes Wear Capes (11/2)
Son Lux - Brighter Wounds (2/9)
Mary Gauthier - Rifles And Rosary Beads (1/26)
Jungle - For Ever (9/14)
Cat Power - Wanderer (10/5)
Porches - The House (1/19)
Sophie - Oil Of Every Pearl’s Un-Insides (6/15)
Capital Cities - Solarize (8/10)
Towkio - WWW. (2/23)
Kylie Minogue - Golden (4/6)
Lonnie Holley - Mith (9/21)
Tom Morello - The Atlas Underground (10/5)
YG - Stay Dangerous (8/3)

C-
Arctic Monkeys - Tranquility Base Hotel & Casino (5/11)
Post Malone - Beerbongs & Bentleys (4/27)
Sheck Wes - Mudboy (10/5)
30 Seconds To Mars - America (4/6)
Jon Bellion - Glory Sound Prep (11/9)
Emily Warren - Quiet Your Mind (10/5)
Bebe Rexha - Expectations (6/22)
Lil Yachty - Lil Boat 2 (3/9)
Anne-Marie - Speak Your Mind (4/27)
Colleen Green - Casey’s Tape/Harmontown Loops (9/7)
Mike Shinoda - Post Traumatic (6/15)
Earl Sweatshirt - Some Rap Songs (11/30)

D+
Ne-Yo - Good Man (6/8)
Usher - “A” (10/12)
Fetty Wap - Bruce Wayne (6/8)
Dave Matthews Band - Come Tomorrow (6/8)
Fall Out Boy - Mania (1/19)
Now, Now - Saved (5/18)
Rhye - Blood (2/2)
Neil & Liam Finn - Light Sleeper (8//24)
Juice WRLD - Goodbye & Good Riddance (5/23)

D
KYLE - Light Of Mine (5/18)
Bazzi - Cosmic (4/13)
Quavo - Quavo Huncho (10/12)
Kate Nash - Yesterday Was Forever (3/30)
The Aces - When My Heart Felt Volcanic (4/6)

D-
5 Seconds of Summer - Youngblood (6/15)
Muse - The Void (11/9)
Drake - Scorpion (6/29)
Matt and Kim - Almost Everyday (5/4)
Awolnation - Here Come The Runts (2/2)

F (AKA: My least favorite album of the year)
Panic! At The Disco - Pray For The Wicked (6/22)

The Top 20 Albums of 2017
#20. Anderson .Paak - Oxnard
Image result for anderson paak oxnard
Standout Track: "6 Summers"
Other Must-Hears: "Tints (ft. Kendrick Lamar)" & "Who R U?"

Anderson .Paak received mostly praise (with some mixed reviews that felt it was an average album from an above-average artist) for Oxnard. The rapping multi-instrumentalist is still flirting with potential greatness as he collaborated with more of his inspirations on his second album including Dr. Dre, Snoop Dogg and Q-Tip. It was never seriously in Album of the Year contention but, it is still another strong album from a creative mind.

#19. Superorganism - Superorganism
Image result for superorganism album
Standout Track: "Everybody Wants To Be Famous"
Other Must-Hears: "Reflections On The Screen" & "Night Time"

Between the random sound effects of traffic, distorted vocals and the opening of multiple soda cans, this album is the musical definition of "bubbly" in 2018. Listeners will either love Superorganism's shtick on the eight-person band's debut as it is certainly an acquired taste and something fresh among the current musical landscape.

#18. Tash Sultana - Flow State
Image result for tash sultana flow state
Standout Track: "Harvest Love"
Other Must-Hears: "Blackbird" & "Free Mind"

An incredible live-performer already, Tash Sultana's guitar driven debut album is perfect music to relax to and get caught up in awe at her powerful vocal performances over some kick-ass guitar playing.

#17. Christine & The Queens - Chris
Image result for christine and the queens chris
Standout Track: "The Walker"
Other Must-Hears: "5 Dollars" & "Girlfriend (ft. Dam-Funk)"

The concept album that landed four tracks on my Top 40 Songs of 2018 list from an artist that missed out on any previous lists from her debut album. Heloise Letissier's second album completely puts her in the character of "Chris", a trans version of herself. None of the songs will gain the cult classic status that "Tilted" will have but, there is not a single skip on this 11-track pop album.

#16. Soccer Mommy - Clean
Image result for soccer mommy clean
Standout Track: "Skin"
Other Must-Hears: "Your Dog" & "Still Clean"

Sophie Allison's first album as Soccer Mommy is a sterling 34-minute indie rock listen that combines the lyrics and delivery of Liz Phair with a lower fidelity sound. As a whole, it's a fantastic first album and given a few years, I expect Soccer Mommy to reach the Car Seat Headrest level of awesome indie rock acts with even more experience to add to her lyrics once she hits legal-drinking age.

#15. Father John Misty - God's Favorite Customer
Image result for god's favorite customer
Standout Track: "Just Dumb Enough To Try"
Other Must-Hears: "Hangout At The Gallows" & "Date Night"

Josh Tillman takes a step back from the bleakness of this idea of a life and instead does more self-reflecting on his fourth album as Father John Misty. There is a much more upbeat or at least less sarcastic version of the man that was focused on the end of the world not even a full year before this album and it's refreshing.

#14. Caroline Rose - Loner
Image result for caroline rose loner
Standout Track: "Jeannie Becomes A Mom"
Other Must-Hears: "Animal" & "To Die Today"

Formerly a country singer, Caroline Rose turned up the weirdness and made her third album a complete Loner, being one of the more uniquely fun albums of 2018. There are sixties' surfer pop sounding songs combined with indie pop bops like the opener, "More Of The Same" and "Jeannie Becomes A Mom".

#13. Odie - Analogue
Image result for odie analogue
Standout Track: "Little Lies"
Other Must-Hears: "Story" & "Midnight"

Another shorter album at just 34-minutes long, Odie is a combination of Sade and Theophilus London on his debut album with a pleasantly smooth singing voice and many songs where his flow is reminiscent of Kid Cudi or London. 

#12. Pusha T - Daytona
Image result for daytona pusha t
Standout Track: "Come Back Baby"
Other Must-Hears: "If You Know You Know" & "What Would Meek Do? (ft. Kanye West)"

In just 21 minutes King Push took us to middle-of-nowhere Wyoming, and with some production help by his G.O.O.D. Music co-captain Kanye West, made THE rap album of the year. With a controversially iconic album cover of Whitney Houston's crack-filled bathroom, Pusha T keeps finding new ways to make dealing cocaine sound like the coolest shit ever (Don't do this, kids) on his third solo record.

#11. Years & Years - Palo Santo
Related image
Standout Track: "Don't Panic"
Other Must-Hears: "Sanctify" & "Preacher"

Olly Alexander and company have perfected the art of electropop over the first two Years & Years records. I may not have ever been fully invested in whatever their sci-fi themed Palo Santo videos were but, the music more than made up for that as this is Years & Years unrestrained and much more in your face than the bubbly-ness that was their first album.

#10. Big Red Machine - Big Red Machine
Image result for big red machine album
Standout Track: "Forest Green"
Other Must-Hears: "Hymnostic" & "Deep Green"

Aaron Dessner from The National and Justin Vernon of Bon Iver fame collaborated on the perfect album for anybody that is a fan of both musical acts. It's glitchy in all the right ways that a Bon Iver album would be and it has beautifully haunting instrumentals the way most The National albums now do. This one has gone under the radar this list season (that's why I still make these lists! There is greatness going unrecognized!) and it stars two widely acclaimed artists in the indie scene.

#9. Metric - Art Of Doubt
Image result for metric art of doubt
Standout Track: "Dressed To Suppress"
Other Must-Hears: "Now Or Never Now" & "Art Of Doubt"

A return to form for the Canadian rock band on their seventh album, Art Of Doubt as Metric hops between and blends their harder rocking beginnings with their latest decade of synth-driven music and together, they made an album that sounds pretty damn convincing as a greatest hits compilation. Fantasies is still the best Metric album but, at least they have a pretty clear top-two now.

#8. Jorja Smith - Lost & Found
Image result for jorja smith lost & found
Standout Track: "Blue Lights"
Other Must-Hears: "The One" & "Lifeboats (Freestyle)"

I've been waiting for a decade to find the next soulful Amy Winehouse-like lyricist and finally, I think Jorja Smith is the closest we're getting to those days being revisited. The 21-year old might not have the lyrical content that made Winehouse an icon yet but, she's still exceeding in that category over many other artists trying to recapture the hype surrounding Amy after Back To Black. Jorja Smith and "Hotline Bling" were the only two good things to come out of Drake's 2015 album, Views.
#7. Janelle Monae - Dirty Computer
Image result for dirty computer album
Standout Track: "Americans"
Other Must-Hears: "Make Me Feel" & "Crazy, Classic, Life"

The top eight here feels like it's on a whole other tier compared to everything listed thus far. Dirty Computer is rightfully nominated at the Grammy Awards for Album of the Year as Janelle Monae comes for that EGOT title with an epic pop album that hops from pop to rap to funk. Janelle Monae in 2018 is the closest thing we have to a Lady Gaga in 2010 right now. She's also the closest thing we have to a living, female version of Prince.

#6. Young Fathers - Cocoa Sugar
Image result for young fathers cocoa sugar album cover
Standout Track: "In My View"
Other Must-Hears: "Border Girl" & "Fee Fi"

The Scottish hip hop trio Young Fathers already had a Mercury Prize (for 2014's Dead) and my #20 album of 2015 (White Men Are Black Men Too) so, it was not an enormous surprise to find that I enjoyed their latest output. What was surprising is how they just keep getting better and with no two songs sounding exactly the same on Cocoa Sugar, it's amazing this isn't getting more love this list season. There are songs to fire the listener up, songs to make the listener think while dancing and every beat switch brings chills.

#5. Car Seat Headrest - Twin Fantasy (Face To Face)
Image result for car seat headrest twin fantasy (face to face)
Standout Track: "Famous Prophets (Stars)"
Other Must-Hears: "Beach Life-In-Death" & "Nervous Young Inhumans"

Unless you were a friend of the band back in 2011, this album was new in 2018. With great success comes money and with money comes new recording equipment, better studios and enough fame that eventually the fans decide they want to hear more. Once Car Seat Headrest's 2016 album Teens of Denial was universally hailed as a breakout album for the band, many took notice to their 2010's take on The Cars and went back and listened to the NINE(!) previous albums they had released since 2010. One that stood out was 2011's Twin Fantasy. The band decided to update those songs and give them a cleaner sound and voila, it's even better than originally recorded.

#4. Various Artists - Black Panther Soundtrack
Image result for black panther soundtrack
Standout Track: "Opps (by Vince Staples with Yugen Blakrok)"
Other Must-Hears: "Pray For Me (by Kendrick Lamar with The Weeknd) "Big Shot (by Kendrick Lamar with Travis Scott)"

My favorite soundtrack to a film in years. It helps when the accompanying movie is wildly entertaining but, the soundtrack to Black Panther could have survived as a standalone album called "Kendrick Lamar and Friends" or "Kung Fu Kenny's Bar-B-Q Playlist". It's just stacked from top to bottom with potential smash hit after smash hit by some of the biggest names off the TDE label (Lamar, SZA, Jay Rock, etc.), some of the best vocalists around (James Blake, The Weeknd and Khalid) and a few artists already mentioned on this very list (Anderson .Paak, Jorja Smith and just missing the cut, Travis Scott). Nothing but bangers from top to bottom and one of my four A-plus albums of 2018.

#3. Troye Sivan - Bloom
Related image
Standout Track: "My My My!"
Other Must-Hears: "Animal" & "Bloom"

Pop music is no longer popular because of how similar all of it sounds and how similar all of the topics are in those songs. Bloom was the only pop album that felt like a huge deal in both the build-up and release of the album. With "My My My!" (my #2 song of the year) coming out in January, the hype just kept mounting behind this album until it's eventual release on the last Friday of August. Incredibly, Sivan's second album exceeded expectations as he matured dramatically since his first album (2015's Blue Neighborhood). Not only is he openly singing about other men on basically every song but, there's songs referencing the features he liked most in his possible partners (think the "buzzcut" line in "My My My!"), a song about an encounter with a much older man when Troye was just 17 ("Seventeen") and a song directly in-your-face about gay sex (The title track). This album is a hell of a ride with sad songs that are actually sad and upbeat pop songs that should have dominated the charts and radio this year because of some tremendous storytelling.

#2. The 1975 - A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships
Image result for the 1975 album a brief inquiry into online relationships
Standout Track: "The Man Who Married A Robot/Love Theme"
Other Must-Hears: "Love It If We Made It" & "Sincerity Is Scary"

I never saw this one coming. The 1975 were an average band to me in 2013, as I gave their self-titled debut album a B- (Promising but, nothing truly special yet) and their second still-obnoxiously-titled second album a C+ (Didn't care for the direction they were going sonically and thought the lyrics were a step down also). Typically, there is some sign that a band or artist is going to have an all-timer of an album but... nobody saw the modern pop version of whichever Radiohead album you want to compare this one to. (OK Computer was the one NME went with.) The album deals with addiction, insecurities and (as hinted at by the title) relationships in 2018 with technology as a variable.

The #1 Album of 2018               
Beach House - 7
Image result for beach house 7
Standout Track: "Dark Spring"
Other Must-Hears: "Lemon Glow" & "Dive"

Seven albums in and Beach House is still finding ways to make similar sounds just unfamiliar enough to still sound fresh and exciting. 7 is the first Beach House record that could be played at a party or during a complete breakdown and it would fit either scenario. It's just a gorgeous album with gorgeous, sometimes eerie sounds guiding the music on every song to an explosive conclusion. It may not have been the most enthralling album with smash hit after smash hit (only one song on my end-of-year Top 40 among the three songs with official videos) but, there is not a single weak spot or interlude to 7 with all 11 tracks being highlights in a long career for the band and in my opinion, that makes this the Album of the Year for 2018.

Here's to 2019 and may the New Year bring more sweet, sweet music to my ears and yours.

Saturday, December 29, 2018

WRBL 2018 Finale: Scott Boomed Me. He (expletive) Got Me.

Wisconsin Rapids Bro League

Week 16
Our 4th official season of blaming Cole Walters for Andy not having Venmo.

Playoff Results
#1 Scott Aschebrook  158 #3 Ryan Dougherty  98
#4 Nick Zurawski  126 #2 Alec Swanson  113
#6 Darrin Aschebrook  186 #5 Cole Walters  128
#7 Andy Todd  131 #8 Tyler Sneen  128

Heroes of the Week: WR Antonio Brown (Darrin), QB Aaron Rodgers (Darrin), TE Zach Ertz (Sneen)


Image result for antonio brown saints
(AP Photo/Butch Dill)
Hero of the Week: WR Antonio Brown (Team ChowHounds)
Waiver Wonders: QB Nick Foles (30 points), QB Sam Darnold (25), QB Baker Mayfield (24)

Zeroes of the Week: TE Rob Gronkowski (Sneen), Owner Ryan Dougherty, Owner Ryan Dougherty.... Owner Ryan Dougherty

Image may contain: 1 person, sitting and outdoor
Zero of the Week: Team Owner Ryan Dougherty (Team Easy Breesy)
Upcoming Week 17 NFL Schedule (in CT)
Miami @ Buffalo NOON
Detroit @ Green Bay NOON
NY Jets @ New England NOON
Carolina @ New Orleans NOON
Dallas @ NY Giants NOON
Atlanta @ Tampa Bay NOON
Jacksonville @ Houston NOON
LA Chargers @ Denver 3:25 PM
Oakland @ Kansas City 3:25 PM
San Francisco @ LA Rams 3:25 PM
Chicago @ Minnesota 3:25 PM
Cincinnati @ Pittsburgh 3:25 PM
Arizona @ Seattle 3:25 PM
Philadelphia @ Washington 3:25 PM
Cleveland @ Baltimore 3:25 PM
Indianapolis @ Tennessee 7:20 PM

NOTE #1: All Week 17 Games are on Sunday.

NOTE #2: WRBL Year In Review, happening before next season. Just hold your horses on that coming anytime soon.

Bro...
The 2019 season better bring some drama or at least some spicier memes because 2018 was a puzzle for ages 8 and below. There was no mystery surrounding who would win the league once Patrick Mahomes kept on churning out 20-30 point games week after week. Ten consecutive wins after the Mahomes and Dalvin Cook for David Johnson trade and Scott Aschebrook is our 2018 Wisconsin Rapids Bro League champion. It doesn't help that his opponent did not even try this week by leaving an inactive player in his lineup for the first time all season. It would not have eliminated the fact that Scott dropped an impressive 158 points and one player doesn't erase a 60-point deficit but still, it'd be nice if defending champion Ryan Dougherty didn't clearly give his sibling a pity victory by leaving Todd Gurley in his lineup when all Team Easy Breesy needed was C.J. Anderson off waivers and maybe flipping Eric Ebron's 1 point for Kyle Rudolph's 32 points and the championship would not have been our most lopsided final yet. Again, Scott earned this with Joe Mixon and Odell Beckham Jr. (the two players acquired in our controversial yet brave Duke Johnson trade) both out of his lineup this week and in reality, it was the far more balanced and acclaimed Mahomes/Cook trade that made the difference come playoff time. After a 1-3 start despite the Chiefs' Quarterback's incredible start to the 2018 season, my team needed a face-lift so Crazy Todd's Driveway Band sent the flaming hot St. Patrick and the injured Dalvin Cook to Scott for underperforming-at-the-time David Johnson, a first round pick that managed to eclipse a 200-point season. I told Scott that Cook would help him come playoff time once the Viking RB was fully healthy and voila, that actually happened. Of course, I also thought that the best quarterback in the league all year long would slow the hell down and sure, he didn't throw six touchdowns again after I dealt him but, Patrick Mahomes is my choice for NFL MVP.


Image result for Dalvin cook lions 2018
Jose Juarez/APCook's 41 points during Scott's playoff run were the Viking RB's most over a two-week stretch in 2018.

In other. more fun WRBL championship week matches, Darrin didn't blow any leads this year over Cole. Big deficits are easier to hold onto when your team drops a 186 over championship weekend the way The ChowHounds did behind Aaron Rodgers' (42) and Antonio Brown's (44) best weekends of 2018. Both performances were enough to land each on All-Bro Teams, which was surprisingly not on pace to happen until week 16. Congratulations on being second-best loser, Cole. As it turns out, the weakest link among the winners' bracket was our very own Tax Paying Homeowner, Alec Swanson. Even with Ryan TanneKILLing any chance of his return to Miami under center in 2019 while putting up a single digit (9 points) for Dolphin fan Nick Zurawski, The Tax Evadinng Vagrant snuck in a 126-113 win to finish in third again. With the lower total in points this week, Nick ended up tying Scott in the WRBL Hypothetical Standings but, managed to score more points over the entirety of the season than our champion somehow so, congratulations to Nick Zurawski on the Hypothetical Championship! (PS: Nick and Scott should really play week 17 for the REAL championship. Just an idea). Lastly (Literally), Sneen and I put on a show and the week's best battle as it came down to Harrison Butker (the same kicker that won Scott third place over Nick last season) and Russell Wilson (who I snagged off waivers from Scott after our first trade) needing 37 points on Sunday Night Football and dropping 40 because I might have bad seasons every now and then but, I'll never be a MoonBak. Props to Sneen on going 1-14-1 in the Hypothetical Standings. I sure hope all those weeks where you left an inactive player in your lineup was worth the momentary relief you felt before I snatched victory from your pitiful Patriots (Brady & Gronk combining for 5 points? Ouch). Back-to-Back MoonBak Bowl win-loser Tyler Sneen will rebound next year and he'll at least finish in 7th, that is my bold prediction going forward.

In the NFL, watch Sunday Night Football to see the AFC South's second playoff team decided between the Colts and Titans. Anytime a playoff spot is on the line and Blaine Gabbert is potentially involved, that is must-watch television. Speaking of AFC South football, I have a co-worker who's a Jaguars fan and I can only imagine how many tears will be shed during Blake Bortles' likely final start for Jacksonville in Houston against the 
slumping Texans. Bortlemania is back, baby and the Texans might just get knocked out of the third seed as a result. In other sports news, Bowl Season is rolling along strong with the playoff matches taking place on Saturday between Clemson-Notre Dame and Alabama-Oklahoma, Bryce Harper and Manny Machado are still available and the Bucks(!!!) have the best record in the NBA. We are living in unique times these days. I just hope the league can gather 'round next year, make some slight adjustments to our rules (Should the playoffs even be a thing?) and reignite the fiery desire to win that Ryan so clearly did not have this week in the most disgraceful championship showing we have seen as a league. I'm sure Ryan was just channeling his Tony Romo, vacationing before a big game.
He deserves a redemption after being fucked over by the Rams and we deserve a chance to deny him that redemption for not thinking ahead of the game the way every other owner would have. 


Image may contain: 3 people, people smiling
A perfect example of someone both thinking ahead and exploiting a loophole in the rules.
Until next time...

First Team All-Bro
QB - Patrick Mahomes (Andy Todd/Scott Aschebrook)
RB - Christian McCaffrey (Scott Aschebrook)
RB - Todd Gurley (Ryan Dougherty)
WR - Davante Adams (Scott Aschebrook)
WR - Antonio Brown (Darrin Aschebrook)
TE - Travis Kelce (Nick Zurawski)
FLEX - Saquon Barkley* (Alec Swanson)
K - Wil Lutz (Alec Swanson)
D/ST - Houston Texans (Tyler Sneen/Nick Zurawski/Ryan Dougherty)

Second Team All-Bro
QB - Aaron Rodgers (Darrin Aschebrook)
RB - Alvin Kamara (Darrin Aschebrook)
RB - Ezekiel Elliott (Nick Zurawski)
WR - DeAndre Hopkins (Nick Zurawski)
WR - Michael Thomas (Ryan Dougherty)
TE - Zach Ertz (Tyler Sneen)
FLEX - Tyreek Hill (Alec Swanson)
K - Harrison Butker (Andy Todd)
D/ST - Los Angeles Rams (Scott Aschebrook)


Scoring Leaders

QB
Patrick Mahomes 353 (Andy/Scott)
Aaron Rodgers 298 (Darrin)
Drew Brees 296 (Ryan)
Matt Ryan 287 (Alec)
Cam Newton 240 (Nick)
Tom Brady 193 (Sneen)
Jared Goff 144 (Andy)
DeShaun Watson 133 (Cole)
Andrew Luck 128 (Cole)
Russell Wilson 106 (Scott/Andy)
Philip Rivers 60 (Nick/Scott)
Jameis Winston 43 (Sneen)
Lamar Jackson 38 (Andy)
Carson Wentz 35 (Scott/Ryan)
Ryan Fitzpatrick 31 (Cole/Sneen)
Mitchell Trubisky 28 (Alec)
Kirk Cousins 20 (Nick)
Ryan Tannehill 9 (Nick)
Andy Dalton 7 (Darrin)

RB
Christian McCaffrey 367 (Scott)
Todd Gurley 360 (Ryan)
Saquon Barkley 351 (Alec)
Alvin Kamara 340 (Darrin)
Ezekiel Elliott 314 (Nick)
Melvin Gordon 257 (Alec)
James Conner 256 (Cole)
James White 248 (Darrin)
Kareem Hunt 223 (Andy)
David Johnson 221 (Scott/Andy)
Joe Mixon 174 (Andy/Scott)
Tevin Coleman 112 (Cole)
Phillip Lindsay 107 (Ryan)
Tarik Cohen 102 (Alec)
Sony Michel 100 (Sneen)
Leonard Fournette 82 (Cole)
Aaron Jones 81 (Nick)
Jordan Howard 78 (Ryan/Andy)
Isaiah Crowell 73 (Sneen)
Nick Chubb 71 (Scott)
LeSean McCoy 66 (Darrin)
Matt Breida 64 (Andy)
Lamar Miller 63 (Darrin)
T.J. Yeldon 63 (Nick/Cole)
Dalvin Cook 55 (Andy/Scott)
Marlon Mack 44 (Cole)
Giovani Bernard 43 (Nick)
Jamaal Williams 43 (Sneen/Darrin)
Chris Carson 42 (Nick)
Kenyan Drake 37 (Nick)
Mark Ingram 37 (Scott)
Jalen Richard 37 (Sneen)
Austin Ekeler 36 (Andy/Nick)
Alex Collins 35 (Sneen)
Kerryon Johnson 31 (Nick)
Gus Edwards 30 (Andy)
Adrian Peterson 30 (Ryan)
Damien Williams 29 (Cole)
Elijah McGuire 23 (Cole)
Chris Thompson 23 (Scott)
Latavius Murray 19 (Darrin)
Duke Johnson Jr. 18 (Andy)
Dion Lewis 18 (Nick/Ryan)
Carlos Hyde 17 (Scott)
Javorius Allen 16 (Darrin)
Derrick Henry 15 (Andy)
Jaylen Samuels 15 (Andy)
Marshawn Lynch 14 (Cole)
Devonta Freeman 12 (Sneen)
Jeff Wilson Jr. 10 (Cole)
Josh Adams 8 (Ryan)
Peyton Barber 3 (Cole)
Marcus Murphy 3 (Andy)

WR
Davante Adams 324 (Scott)
Antonio Brown 317 (Darrin)
DeAndre Hopkins 302 (Nick)
Michael Thomas 300 (Ryan)
Tyreek Hill 294 (Alec)
Adam Thielen 293 (Cole)
Julio Jones 289 (Ryan)
JuJu Smith-Schuster 260 (Sneen)
Mike Evans 254 (Scott)
Keenan Allen 241 (Nick)
Stefon Diggs 237 (Alec)
T.Y. Hilton 224 (Andy)
Odell Beckham Jr. 180 (Andy/Scott)
Robert Woods 176 (Sneen)
A.J. Green 144 (Cole)
Brandin Cooks 116 (Nick)
Emmanuel Sanders 97 (Cole)
Jarvis Landry 91 (Scott)
Demaryius Thomas 91 (Darrin)
Amari Cooper 77 (Alec)
Julian Edelman 71 (Nick)
Larry Fitzgerald 71 (Cole)
Alshon Jeffery 69 (Ryan)
Tyler Lockett 65 (Darrin)
Josh Gordon 61 (Andy)
Cooper Kupp 61 (Alec)
Golden Tate 54 (Ryan)
Sammy Watkins 52 (Sneen)
Tyler Boyd 48 (Cole)
Doug Baldwin 34 (Sneen)
Sterling Shepard 32 (Andy)
D.J. Moore 28 (Alec)
Chris Hogan 27 (Sneen)
Corey Davis 26 (Ryan/Andy)
Marvin Jones 20 (Darrin)
Allen Robinson 19 (Alec)
Chris Godwin 18 (Darrin)
Will Fuller 17 (Sneen)
Devin Funchess 14 (Andy)
Nelson Agholor 13 (Ryan)
John Brown 12 (Andy)
Keelan Cole 12 (Andy)
Jamison Crowder 9 (Andy)
Taylor Gabriel 9 (Alec)
Randall Cobb 8 (Nick)
Kenny Golladay 5 (Scott)
Courtland Sutton 3 (Cole)
DeVante Parker 1 (Cole)

TE
Travis Kelce 275 (Nick)
Zach Ertz 270 (Sneen)
George Kittle 209 (Cole)
Eric Ebron 152 (Ryan)
Jared Cook 100 (Scott/Darrin)
Jimmy Graham 87 (Darrin)
David Njoku 87 (Alec)
Rob Gronkowski 78 (Sneen)
Jordan Reed 78 (Scott/Nick)
Evan Engram 62 (Andy/Scott)
Austin Hooper 58 (Andy/Scott)
Trey Burton 44 (Alec)
Kyle Rudolph 43 (Ryan)
O.J. Howard 39 (Andy)
C.J. Uzomah 26 (Darrin/Andy)
Greg Olsen 13 (Ryan/Cole)
Benjamin Watson 10 (Andy)
Delanie Walker 9 (Cole)
Cameron Brate 6 (Andy)
Ian Thomas 3 (Scott)

K
Wil Lutz 147 (Alec)
Harrison Butker 139 (Andy)
Mason Crosby 138 (Sneen)
Stephen Gostkowski 125 (Nick)
Justin Tucker 125 (Scott)
Matt Prater 98 (Ryan/Cole)
Greg Zuerlein 96 (Ryan)
Dan Bailey 54 (Darrin)
Matt Bryant 52 (Cole)
Robbie Gould 44 (Darrin)
Ka'imi Fairbairn 21 (Andy/Scott)
Adam Vinatieri 14 (Nick/Ryan)
Jake Elliott 10 (Darrin)
Cairo Santos 10 (Ryan)
Jason Myers 6 (Scott)
Ryan Succop 5 (Nick)
Graham Gano 3 (Alec)
Chris Boswell 2 (Darrin)

DF
Houston Texans 102 (Sneen/Nick/Ryan)
Los Angeles Rams 100 (Scott)
Chicago Bears 98 (Andy)
Minnesota Vikings 86 (Cole/Darrin)
Baltimore Ravens 72 (Darrin/Andy/Scott)
Indianapolis Colts 67 (Andy/Sneen)
Jacksonville Jaguars 59 (Alec)
Los Angeles Chargers 38 (Nick)
Miami Dolphins 37 (Sneen/Nick/Ryan)
Philadelphia Eagles 34 (Ryan)
Green Bay Packers 31 (Sneen/Cole)
Cleveland Browns 24 (Nick/Darrin/Cole)
New England Patriots 24 (Nick/Andy)
Buffalo Bills 22 (Cole/Nick)
Carolina Panthers 21 (Cole)
Dallas Cowboys 19 (Cole/Alec)
Detroit Lions 19 (Cole)
Kansas City Chiefs 17 (Alec)
Arizona Cardinals 16 (Cole/Nick)
Denver Broncos 15 (Nick/Alec)
Tennessee Titans 15 (Nick)
Washington 14 (Ryan)
Pittsburgh Steelers 11 (Alec)
New York Jets 4 (Darrin/Andy)
Seattle Seahawks 4 (Andy)
New Orleans Saints -4 (Andy)

Hypothetical Standings
Tax Evading Vagrant 12-4
Walter Polish Z Slayers 12-4
Tax Paying Homeowner 11-5
Team Easy Breesy 8-8
Team ChowHounds 7-9
Colieveland 96ers 6-9-1
Crazy Todd's Driveway Band 6-10
SNEEN MACHINE 1-14-1