Wisconsin Rapids Bro League
Week Thirteen
Our Seventh Official Season of blaming Cole Walters for not enough snowy football games.
Current Standings (with regular season won-loss streaks)
Steven Nett Division
Scott's Many Endeavors (Nick Zurawski) 12-1 W2
Team ChowHounds (Darrin Aschebrook) 8-5 L1
Yeezy Taught Me (Nathaniel Hoefs) 4-9 L3
Todd's Plan (Andy Todd) 4-9 W1
Tanner Glaza Division
Tax Paying Homeowner (Alec Swanson) 8-5 W3
Colieveland 96ers (Cole Walters) 8-5 W3
SNEEN MACHINE (Tyler Sneen) 4-9 L2
Big Nick Energy (Ryan Dougherty) 4-9 L3
Week Thirteen Final Scores
ALEC defeats DARRIN 181.7-155.4
COLE defeats SNEEN 121.2-111.82
NICK defeats RYAN 103.22-89.96
ANDY defeats HOEFS 140.64-125.38
Heroes of the Week: TE George Kittle (39.6), WR Justin Jefferson (35.6), WR Chris Godwin (30.2)
Waiver Wonders: TE Dallas Goedert (28.5), WR Amon-Ra St. Brown (24.8), WR Russell Gage (22)
What-if of the Week: If Sneen Machine RB Darrell Henderson were declared inactive, Sneen might have been forced to dig in free agency for a FLEX option (or he could have just started the underwhelming 3.6 points of WR DeVonta Smith) and he could have replaced that 0.0 with somebody that could have cut into that 9.38-point loss to Cole.
 |
| Raj Mehta - USA TODAY Sports Waiver Wonder: WR Amon-Ra St. Brown (10 catches, 86 yards, 1 TD + 2 rushing yards) |
Upcoming Week 14 Match-ups & NFL Schedule (in CT)
Alec v. Cole
Nick v. Darrin
Andy v. Ryan
Sneen v. Hoefs
Thursday: Pittsburgh @ Minnesota 7:20 PM
Sunday NOON: Baltimore @ Cleveland
Jacksonville @ Tennessee
Las Vegas @ Kansas City
New Orleans @ NY Jets
Dallas @ Washington
Atlanta @ Carolina
Seattle @ Houston
3:05 PM: Detroit @ Denver
NY Giants @ LA Chargers
3:25 PM: San Francisco @ Cincinnati
Buffalo @ Tampa Bay
Sunday Night Football: Chicago @ Green Bay 7:20 PM
Monday Night Football: LA Rams @ Arizona 7:15 PM
BYES: Miami, New England, Indianapolis, Philadelphia
Bro...
I hope you are all enjoying this slog of a fantasy football season because I actually am despite the mountain of injured football players I have to walk around carefully on my way to work every night. There seem to be entire teams like the Saints, Ravens, Giants and Titans NOT fielding formidable NFL lineups just on their injured reserves! It wouldn't be so difficult to maneuver if it weren't for the week-to-week game-time decisions like last week's Darrell Henderson ACTIVE but not really playing fiasco! (thanks Sean McVay) Even with Nick Zurawski hovering his posterior over the throne (nobody gets to sit in it until they actually win the championship) at 12-1, I'm starting to notice the very real competitive sides come out in the other postseason contenders. For instance, that Darrell Henderson active rest game could have seriously shifted fortunes with a Sneen Machine upset over the Colieveland 96ers had he just cut somebody on his bench for Michel but, once reports came out about an hour earlier than gametime that the Rams bell-cow RB was ACTIVE with skepticism surrounding his involvement, Cole JUMPED on the waiver wire and snagged Sony Michel for his bench just so Tyler couldn't have him. That ninth dimensional Trivia Pursuit type of shit is the stuff I respect the hell out of and the NFC LEAST is no more! After winning by single digits over Sneen, Cole's 96ers take on the Tax Paying Homeowner Alec Swanson in the only week 14 matchup that should raise any eyebrows for the winner will prevail as 2021 Tanner Glaza Division Champions at 9-5(!) after one bro will get their fourth consecutive win. It is truly amazing that there's a very real chance of Team Chowhounds finishing below one of these two in win percentage.
 |
| AP The Colieveland 96ers owe a huge debt to the 6-7 Miami Dolphins on their own 5-game winning streak aiding his 3-game hot streak. |
Week 14 should still provide some other flashes of fruitful fantasy football fun as the 96ers now have to survive a week without RB Myles Gaskin, WR Jaylen Waddle, TE Mike Gesicki and the ever-clutch Miami Dolphins defense. It would have been of immense help for Cole had RB D'Andre Swift returned from his shoulder injury but the Lions finally won(!) so they don't have to waste his legs anymore. With Panthers RB Christian McCaffery done for the season again, it's all aboard the Chuba Choo-Choo train for Walters in week 14! In a blessing sent by the fantasy gods, Alec will be without RB1 and 2021 fantasy MVP candidate Jonathan Taylor due to his bye week, thus evening their matchup a bit more fairly perhaps? Nick looks to cap off a 13-1 regular season versus division rival Darrin Aschebrook, though there really isn't much of a rivalry there anymore considering the recent results of said rivals (see: Bears-Packers. Does Darrin know that Tyreek Hill owns him yet?). Finally in a weird twist of fate, the four playoff teams face each other and the four Sacko contenders face each other as Sneen hopes for both RB Dalvin Cook and Henderson to return at fullest strength in order to avoid double-digit losses against Hoefs as he tries to do the same. Oh, and me? I'm just going to start throwing shit at a wall and seeing what sticks against Ryan. Might be feeling like a Godwin Igwebuike/Austin Walter type of week. Good luck to all as we hopefully avoid these same exact matchups next week in the postseason for parity's sake.
Scoring Leaders
QB
Tom Brady 254.4 (Sneen)
Lamar Jackson 238.78 (Nick)
Josh Allen 233.62 (Cole)
Patrick Mahomes 217.72 (Ryan)
Aaron Rodgers 198.18 (Darrin)
Joe Burrow 157.38 (Alec)
Kyler Murray 151.96 (Hoefs)
Russell Wilson 134.86 (Andy)
Justin Herbert 133.92 (Hoefs)
Matthew Stafford 71.08 (Darrin)
Ryan Tannehill 63.06 (Andy)
Daniel Jones 40.3 (Cole/Nick)
Derek Carr 35.68 (Alec)
Jalen Hurts 34.76 (Ryan)
Tua Tagovailoa 26.54 (Cole)
Dak Prescott 21.52 (Sneen)
Carson Wentz 17.14 (Alec)
Justin Fields 14.42 (Andy)
RB
Jonathan Taylor 309.4 (Alec)
Austin Ekeler 260.1 (Sneen)
Najee Harris 215.6 (Cole)
Joe Mixon 214.5 (Nick)
Ezekiel Elliott 195.66 (Nick)
Derrick Henry 193.3 (Darrin)
Aaron Jones 160.9 (Ryan)
Alvin Kamara 158 (Darrin)
Leonard Fournette 151.9 (Darrin)
Nick Chubb 149.3 (Ryan)
Dalvin Cook 146.5 (Sneen)
Christian McCaffrey 127.5 (Hoefs)
David Montgomery 116 (Alec)
James Robinson 119.9 (Ryan)
D'Andre Swift 111.9 (Cole)
Antonio Gibson 104 (Andy)
Josh Jacobs 93.4 (Darrin)
Darrel Williams 89 (Andy)
Darrell Henderson 82.1 (Sneen)
Saquon Barkley 78.3 (Cole)
A.J. Dillon 75.5 (Andy)
Cordarrelle Patterson 75.3 (Sneen)
Alexander Mattison 70.8 (Hoefs/Andy)
James Conner 66.1 (Sneen/Darrin)
Chase Edmonds 56.5 (Hoefs)
Elijah Mitchell 53.8 (Andy)
Chuba Hubbard 50.6 (Andy/Nick)
Damien Harris 50.4 (Andy)
D'Ernest Johnson 47.5 (Hoefs/Nick)
Myles Gaskin 45.2 (Cole)
Mark Ingram 39.7 (Ryan)
Kareem Hunt 38.7 (Hoefs)
Chris Carson 35.4 (Nick)
Clyde Edwards-Helaire 32.2 (Hoefs)
Javonte Williams 29.8 (Nick)
Khalil Herbert 27.1 (Alec)
Alex Collins 26 (Andy/Alec)
Miles Sanders 24.7 (Nick)
J.D. McKissic 15.6 (Cole/Andy)
Devontae Booker 15.2 (Nick)
Mike Davis 12.1 (Alec)
Melvin Gordon 11.2 (Ryan)
Tevin Coleman 10.7 (Hoefs)
Kenyan Drake 10.5 (Ryan)
Zack Moss 10.3 (Ryan)
Michael Carter 9.6 (Cole)
Jamaal Williams 9 (Cole)
Devonta Freeman 8.8 (Hoefs)
D'Onta Foreman 5 (Hoefs)
Devin Singletary 3.6 (Hoefs)
Adrian Peterson 3 (Alec)
Kenneth Gainwell 2.7 (Hoefs)
Raheem Mostert 2 (Cole)
James White 0.6 (Andy)
WR
Cooper Kupp 304.1 (Hoefs)
Tyreek Hill 236.8 (Nick)
Davante Adams 218.3 (Cole)
Keenan Allen 204.9 (Andy)
Stefon Diggs 202.8 (Hoefs)
Justin Jefferson 186 (Alec)
Deebo Samuel 174.7 (Nick)
Adam Thielen 163 (Darrin)
Michael Pittman Jr. 157.3 (Ryan)
Mike Evans 151.5 (Andy)
DK Metcalf 148.7 (Alec)
CeeDee Lamb 146.1 (Hoefs)
Terry McLaurin 142.7 (Nick)
Chris Godwin 131.9 (Alec)
Amari Cooper 127.9 (Ryan)
D.J. Moore 126.9 (Sneen)
A.J. Brown 126.5 (Alec)
DeAndre Hopkins 125.6 (Darrin)
Jaylen Waddle 120.6 (Cole)
Ja'Marr Chase 113.3 (Sneen)
Brandin Cooks 112.4 (Darrin)
Diontae Johnson 102.9 (Andy)
Mike Williams 99.8 (Sneen)
Calvin Ridley 71.1 (Andy)
Robert Woods 63.6 (Sneen)
Tee Higgins 58.6 (Cole)
Marquise Brown 48.3 (Darrin)
DeVonta Smith 29.9 (Ryan/Sneen)
Courtland Sutton 26.5 (Cole)
Allen Robinson 24.6 (Sneen)
Jakobi Meyers 20.8 (Hoefs)
Hunter Renfrow 20.3 (Hoefs)
Julio Jones 19.4 (Ryan)
Darnell Mooney 17.5 (Hoefs)
D.J. Chark 16.8 (Cole)
Randall Cobb 16.5 (Cole)
Michael Gallup 15.6 (Ryan)
Emmanuel Sanders 14.1 (Cole)
Tyler Lockett 13.5 (Andy)
Jerry Jeudy 12.9 (Alec)
Chase Claypool 11.1 (Ryan)
Elijah Moore 9.3 (Darrin)
Kadarius Toney 9.06 (Andy)
Van Jefferson 8.4 (Andy)
Christian Kirk 4.5 (Ryan)
TE
Travis Kelce 189.2 (Andy)
Mark Andrews 179.1 (Sneen)
Darren Waller 129.3 (Hoefs)
T.J. Hockenson 126.4 (Alec)
George Kittle 111.9 (Darrin)
Kyle Pitts 111.6 (Ryan)
Noah Fant 109.4 (Nick)
Mike Gesicki 94.8 (Cole)
Logan Thomas 39.8 (Cole/Andy)
Rob Gronkowski 31.3 (Ryan)
Dalton Schultz 26.8 (Darrin)
Dallas Goedert 25.2 (Hoefs)
Tyler Higbee 25.2 (Darrin)
Pat Freiermuth 18.7 (Nick/Hoefs)
Jared Cook 10.8 (Nick)
Tyler Conklin 9.5 (Alec)
Robert Tonyan 7.9 (Alec)
Dawson Knox 7.5 (Ryan)
Hunter Henry 4.3 (Sneen)
K
Justin Tucker 113 (Sneen)
Tyler Bass 101 (Cole)
Harrison Butker 98 (Darrin)
Matt Gay 93 (Nick/Alec)
Nick Folk 89 (Hoefs)
Brandon McManus 81 (Alec/Andy)
Daniel Carlson 77 (Ryan/Nick)
Matt Prater 55 (Andy/Sneen/Andy)
Greg Joseph 51 (Ryan)
Mason Crosby 27 (Hoefs/Cole)
Jason Sanders 21 (Andy)
Ryan Succop 21 (Alec)
Younghoe Koo 17 (Hoefs)
Randy Bullock 12 (Andy)
Greg Zuerlein 10 (Nick)
Graham Gano 6 (Darrin)
Josh Lambo 1 (Ryan)
DF
New England Patriots 76 (Nick/Ryan)
Tampa Bay Buccaneers 74 (Alec)
Arizona Cardinals 64 (Cole/Sneen)
Miami Dolphins 61 (Cole)
Los Angeles Rams 59 (Cole/Andy/Nick)
Buffalo Bills 52 (Sneen/Nick)
New Orleans Saints 50 (Ryan/Darrin)
Indianapolis Colts 44 (Ryan/Nick/Cole/Hoefs)
Denver Broncos 40 (Andy)
Cleveland Browns 32 (Nick/Andy)
Carolina Panthers 29 (Darrin/Alec/Hoefs)
San Francisco 49ers 26 (Nick/Cole/Hoefs/Andy)
Pittsburgh Steelers 20 (Hoefs/Sneen)
Dallas Cowboys 17 (Hoefs/Darrin)
Philadelphia Eagles 12 (Alec)
Baltimore Ravens 9 (Sneen/Hoefs)
Green Bay Packers 9 (Cole)
Houston Texans 8 (Nick)
Atlanta Falcons 6 (Cole)
Tennessee Titans 5 (Hoefs/Nick)
Las Vegas Raiders 4 (Hoefs)
Washington Football Team 3 (Darrin)
Cincinnati Bengals 2 (Nick/Hoefs)
Chicago Bears 0 (Ryan/Andy)
Hypothetical Standings (Top 4 scorers win, bottom 4 lose)
Scott's Many Endeavors 10-3
Team ChowHounds 7-6
Yeezy Taught Me 7-6
Tax Paying Homeowner 7-6
SNEEN MACHINE 6-7
Colieveland 96ers 6-7
Big Nick Energy 5-8
Todd's Plan 4-9
No comments:
Post a Comment