WRBL Week 4, 2018 Recap

Wisconsin Rapids Bro League

Week 4
Our 4th official season of blaming Cole Walters for people chewing with their mouths open.


Current Standings (with regular season won-loss streaks)
Steven Nett Division

Team Easy Breesy (Ryan Dougherty) 3-1 L1
Team ChowHounds (Darrin Aschebrook) 3-1 W2
The Scottfather (Scott Aschebrook) 2-2 L1
Cole World (Cole Walters) 2-2 W1

Shooter McGavin Division
Tax Paying Homeowner (Alec Swanson) 3-1 W3
Perfectly Balanced (Nick Zurawski) 2-2 W1
Crazy Todd's Driveway Band (Andy Todd) 1-3 L2
SNEEN MACHINE (Tyler Sneen) 0-4 L4

Week Four Final Scores

DARRIN  134 SCOTT  129
ALEC  169 RYAN  96
NICK  181 ANDY  114
COLE  132 SNEEN  109

Heroes of the Week: RB Alvin Kamara (Darrin), RB Ezekiel Elliott (Nick), WR DeAndre Hopkins (Nick)

Tom Pennington, Getty Images
Hero of the Week: RB Ezekiel Elliott (Perfectly Balanced)

Waiver Wonders: QB Mitchell Trubisky (43 points), WR Corey Davis (31), QB Derek Carr (31)

Quinn Harris/USA TODAY Sports
Waiver Wonder: QB Mitchell Trubisky (354 yards & 6 TD passes)

Zeroes of the Week: DF Minnesota Vikings (Cole)

Upcoming Week 5 Match-ups & NFL Schedule (in CT)

Darrin vs. Cole
Nick vs. Scott
Ryan vs. Andy
Alec vs. Sneen
Thursday: Indianapolis @ New England 7:20 PM
Sunday: Tennessee @ Buffalo NOON
Miami @ Cincinnati NOON
Baltimore @ Cleveland NOON
Green Bay @ Detroit NOON
Jacksonville @ Kansas City NOON
Denver @ NY Jets NOON
Atlanta @ Pittsburgh NOON
NY Giants @ Carolina NOON
Oakland @ LA Chargers 3:05 PM
Minnesota @ Philadelphia 3:25 PM
Arizona @ San Francisco 3:25 PM
LA Rams @ Seattle 3:25 PM
Dallas @ Houston 7:20 PM
Monday: Washington @ New Orleans 7:15 PM
Bye Weeks: Chicago & Tampa Bay

Bro...

SOUND THE ALARM, A TRADE HAS BEEN MADE! In what is the first trade of a potentially chaotic pre-deadline trading period, 2-2 Scottfather Scott Aschebrook did some needed spicing up of his roster by striking a deal with a somewhat desperate 1-3 Andy Todd. The price to pay in Scott's original proposal was going to be 1st round pick RB David Johnson, no matter what else Scott offered for the league's #2 overall scoring player. At the end of a record-setting-for-brevity trade discussion, I sent QB and 14th round pick (same round as RB Kareem Hunt from 2017) Patrick Mahomes to Scott the Bot along with RB Dalvin Cook (Some explosive games ahead but, it might be too late in the season for my wildcard-desperate team) for a consistent albeit surprisingly quiet thus far RB David Johnson. For those claiming a disparity in the trade, I just acquired QB Jared Goff off of waivers and like Mahomes, he is also 4-0 in reality football and looks like the Peyton Manning compared to Mahomes' Brett Favre-ness. This could come back to bite either one of us in major fashion as we both jumped to some conclusions after the second preseason month but, I think it's much more likely that this was a "Perfectly Balanced" (coined by Nick) trade that will help both sides in finishing around or above .500. In the meantime, I just hope Scott doesn't break ma homie because I need him in my TD-only league as Russell Wilson and Andrew Luck just can't be trusted as great players on bad teams. Give me a great player on a good team every day... unless you can be David Johnson.

"Someday we'll find it, the playoff connection. The Driveway Band, The Scottfather and me." claimed Kermit Mahomes at a week 4 WRBL press conference.

In Non-WRBL sports news. Jeepers Creepers, the Brewers are in the postseason and the Cubs aren't? Which alternate universe did we enter since opening day? Cole Walters and I were both in attendance on Saturday when the Cubs lost and the Brewers needed a win to tie for the division lead with at least one regular season game left. After 161 games, it finally happened and Milwaukee made up the game that was seemingly out of reach all season long because of how talented the Cubs really are. It was truly the most exciting sporting event I've ever attended and I saw Lincoln High School lose a championship football game 0-7. The next day saw both teams win easily and then, game 163. The 163rd game is only used in necessary tiebreaker situations and both the NL Central and NL West needed to be decided by one extra regular season game. Unfortunately much like Cole Walters, I work all the time and had to leave home with the game tied 1-1 in the 7th. After a weekend that saw me inspire Christian Yelich to hit two home runs in a 6-5 baseball game by purchasing his shirt and a Brewers Postseason hat pregame, the Brewers felt the love so much that they ran the table over the weekend and the Cubs. Chicago was so traumatized that Joe Maddon's team dropped their wildcard game to the Rockies already and now, we have Brewers v. Rockies in a series that will see the three-true-outcomes baseball theory reach it's peak. It might not be as exciting as the WRBL race but, baseball has it's moments and the entire month of October is always a moment.

The WRBL continues to frustrate and wins continue to elude Tyler Sneen after a full month of waiting for Le'Veon Bell to suddenly return and help him run the table (Let's speak it into existence). This week was especially brutal as Isaiah Crowell and Jamaal Williams were his starting running backs and combined for three points. Meanwhile, players at the same position like Nyheim Hines (28 points), Duke Johnson Jr. (13), Frank Gore (13), Sony Michel (17) and T.J. Yeldon (22) were all available with higher floors than three measly points. Granted, losing Devonta Freeman for multiple games has not made this an easy road by any means for Sneen and he did have two starting running backs in his lineup but, Crowell wiped his way into the coaches' doghouse and Jamaal Williams is clearly just not as explosive or reliable as Aaron Jones right now in Green Bay. DeShaun "Nipplegate" Watson finally returned to form with 31 points on the other side with Cole back at .500 on the season. Also at .500 now is Nick Zurawski after he scored a whopping 181 points with two Heroes of the Week in DeAndre Hopkins and Ezekiel Elliott. At this point in his WR depth, Nick might not even need PPR-king Julian Edelman coming off suspension this week. I lost to Nick and now T.Y. Hilton is going to miss a game so, Keelan Cole has one last chance to prove his reliability in my lineup before I trade him for a Snickers bar or something. The most intriguing match coming into the weekend was that of the Tax Paying Homeowner Alec Swanson and the man with all of the New Orleans Saints (besides the one who did all the scoring this week), Ryan Dougherty. With zero passing touchdowns and Julio Jones still allergic to paydirt, the Team Easy Breesy was an easy breezy defeat by a final of 169-96. Don't look now but, Alec and Ryan are both 3-1 and Alec's team was perfectly balanced this week (even though Nick ALWAYS is) with every player scoring double digits, even TE Trey Burton. Lastly, the meeting of the Aschebrook's reminded us of how great the days of rivalry football with no controversies were as the stars were on full display (Alvin Kamara, 40 points) with a few nobodies having their biggest star-making games of their careers so far (Jared Cook, 31 points & James White, 30). Ultimately, The Scottfather's daddy brought him into this world and with some Monday Night magic (6 points by Demaryius Thomas), took his team out this week by a final of 134-129.

Jimmy Graham's first touchdown as a Green Bay Packer was one of many small instances of clutch football that won the week for Team ChowHounds.

Supposedly we are about to witness the NFL's 2018 season become much clearer after September's month full of false prophets and fluke performances. With the passing of week four comes back many suspended players that we have not seen in a very long time like WR Julian Edelman, RB Mark Ingram, Ravens cornerback Jimmy Smith and even RB Robert Turbin (the Colts are still looking for a run game so, don't be surprised if he's relevant for a few games). Vontaze Burfict is among those names returning from the naughty list but, it's only a matter of time before the Bengals linebacker gently caresses a quarterback into the grave and is banned for life. The highlight of the week once again involves the undefeated Chiefs and Patrick Mahomes taking on an elite defense (better than Denver's now) and the AFC runner-ups of a year ago, the 3-1 Jacksonville Jaguars. The WRBL will see most owners in panic mode if a new-and-improved Crazy Todd's Driveway Band takes out 3-1 Team Easy Breesy because, we don't remember what it's like to have somebody other than Ryan favored to win the league (I recall a sense of joy among many owners, win or lose). One owner that has earned the right to panic is Tyler Sneen and his machine and at 0-4, a win over the 3-1 Tax Paying Homeowner is both unlikely and seemingly completely necessary. In a rematch of the 2016 championship and 2017 BakMoon Bowl, Darrin and Cole face for a weekend with enough trash-talk to make up for the absence of Richard Sherman. Lastly, there are very few rivalries in the league (unless you're Scott and everyone is a rival) but, the rivalry for the third and fourth seeds between Nick and Scott is quietly intense. Scott once witnessed Nick kill a man with a trident and ever since then, has vowed to avenge that stranger's death through any means necessary (gambling, kicker duels and more!) and now, the two 2-2's get to decide one another's fate as I get the sense that one of these two is about to go on a very lengthy run through shrewd lineup maneuvering (AKA: Pure luck. That's all any of this is). Good luck to you all and may the points continue to fall at a record pace (but no more of these -9s that have now occurred twice thanks to my Saints' defense and now, Cole's Viking defense).

Scoring Leaders

QB

Patrick Mahomes 112 (Andy)

Matt Ryan 104 (Alec)

Drew Brees 95 (Ryan)

Cam Newton 73 (Nick)

Aaron Rodgers 72 (Darrin)

Tom Brady 62 (Sneen)

DeShaun Watson 42 (Cole)

Russell Wilson 41 (Scott)

Ryan Fitzpatrick 24 (Cole)
Philip Rivers 22 (Nick)

Andrew Luck 11 (Cole)

Carson Wentz 11 (Scott)

RB

Alvin Kamara 132 (Darrin)

Todd Gurley 103 (Ryan)

Melvin Gordon 102 (Alec)

Saquon Barkley 87 (Alec)

Ezekiel Elliott 81 (Nick)

James Conner 73 (Cole)

James White 72 (Darrin)

Christian McCaffrey 61 (Scott)

Kareem Hunt 60 (Andy)

David Johnson 56 (Scott)

Isaiah Crowell 46 (Sneen)

Giovani Bernard 43 (Nick)

Jordan Howard 42 (Ryan)

Tevin Coleman 37 (Cole)

Joe Mixon 34 (Andy)

Kenyan Drake 26 (Nick)

Dalvin Cook 24 (Andy)

Matt Breida 23 (Andy)

LeSean McCoy 18 (Darrin)

Javorius Allen 16 (Darrin)

Jamaal Williams 16 (Sneen)

Carlos Hyde 14 (Scott)

Leonard Fournette 8 (Cole)

Adrian Peterson 8 (Ryan)

Devonta Freeman 7 (Sneen)
Dion Lewis 5 (Nick)
Chris Thompson 2 (Scott)

WR

Adam Thielen 98 (Cole)

Michael Thomas 98 (Ryan)

Mike Evans 85 (Scott)

DeAndre Hopkins 84 (Nick)

Tyreek Hill 82 (Alec)

Julio Jones 78 (Ryan)

Stefon Diggs 76 (Alec)

A.J. Green 75 (Cole)

Davante Adams 73 (Scott)

Antonio Brown 73 (Darrin)

Odell Beckham Jr. 64 (Andy)

T.Y. Hilton 61 (Andy)

JuJu Smith-Schuster 61 (Sneen)

Keenan Allen 54 (Nick)

Jarvis Landry 41 (Scott)

Demaryius Thomas 41 (Darrin)

Brandin Cooks 38 (Nick)

Chris Hogan 27 (Sneen)

Emmanuel Sanders 27 (Cole)

Golden Tate 20 (Ryan)

Larry Fitzgerald 19 (Cole)
Allen Robinson 18 (Alec)

Will Fuller 14 (Sneen)

Nelson Agholor 13 (Ryan)

Keelan Cole 12 (Andy)
Cooper Kupp 12 (Alec)
Amari Cooper 1 (Alec)

TE

Travis Kelce 69 (Nick)

Zach Ertz 62 (Sneen)

Rob Gronkowski 43 (Sneen)

George Kittle 42 (Cole)

Trey Burton 39 (Alec)

Kyle Rudolph 39 (Ryan)

Jimmy Graham 37 (Darrin)

Jordan Reed 33 (Scott)

Jared Cook 31 (Scott)

Evan Engram 24 (Andy)

Delanie Walker 9 (Cole)

Greg Olsen 5 (Ryan)
Benjamin Watson 3 (Andy)

K

Justin Tucker 47 (Scott)

Mason Crosby 45 (Sneen)

Wil Lutz 44 (Alec)

Matt Bryant 33 (Cole)

Harrison Butker 32 (Andy)

Robbie Gould 30 (Darrin)

Stephen Gostkowski 29 (Nick)

Matt Prater 20 (Ryan)

Greg Zuerlein 16 (Ryan)

Chris Boswell 2 (Darrin)

DF

Los Angeles Rams 41 (Scott)

Jacksonville Jaguars 36 (Alec)
Chicago Bears 28 (Andy)
Baltimore Ravens 23 (Darrin)

Philadelphia Eagles 23 (Ryan)
Green Bay Packers 21 (Sneen)

Minnesota Vikings 16 (Cole)

Los Angeles Chargers 15 (Nick)

Houston Texans 13 (Sneen)

Cleveland Browns 11 (Nick)

New England Patriots 7 (Nick)

New York Jets 1 (Darrin)

New Orleans Saints -4 (Andy)

Hypothetical Standings

Tax Paying Homeowner 3-1

The Scottfather 3-1

Team ChowHounds 3-1

Team Easy Breesy 2-2

Perfectly Balanced 2-2

Cole World 2-2

Crazy Todd's Driveway Band 1-3

SNEEN MACHINE 0-4