Even though the winners have yet to be announced, there is already a sense of disappointment in the air. The consensus #1 album of the year (according to albumoftheyear.org, a website that has a cumulative list of top albums and songs of the year according to every major publication's end of year lists), David Bowie's Blackstar was snubbed from the Album of the Year nominations despite the committee's propensity to throw awards at the oldest or most-recently deceased artists, whether deserving or not. As a result, there are many mainstream choices that never would have sniffed this ceremony a decade ago (Twentyone Pilots, Lukas Graham, etc.) in major categories while Adele versus Beyonce' becomes the main storyline of the evening as we all should have seen coming had we known of the Bowie snub.
The list of performers at the Staples Center this year is largely a gathering of artists the award show has become familiar with over the past five years (Daft Punk, Adele, Bruno Mars) and a couple of nice throw-ins like Chance The Rapper, A Tribe Called Quest and preggers Beyonce'. It should be an interesting show at the very least with James Corden being an immense improvement in hosting personality over SOMEHOW-5-TIME HOST LL Cool J.
It's time to dig a tad deeper into this award ceremony and figure out who should and who probably will win the major categories as I do every year.
Record of the Year
- "Formation" by Beyonce'
- "Hello" by Adele
- "7 Years" by Lukas Graham
- "Stressed Out" by Twentyone Pilots
- "Work" by Rihanna featuring Drake
Who should win? "Formation"
Who will win? Adele
The widely appreciated #1 song of the year according to a majority of news publications should absolutely win this award and like most years, that means some bullshit is about to go down. "Hello" is a cookie-cutter Adele song that nobody dislikes but, it did not move the cultural needle anywhere near as much as the video, lyrics and subsequent reaction to "Formation" did. In any other year, Adele's victory would be obvious but, this one is going to be a toss-up because it is the Grammy's after all and Adele over Beyonce' is nowhere near as egregious as Meghan Fucking Trainor over Courtney Barnett.
Album of the Year
- 25 by Adele
- A Sailor's Guide To Earth by Sturgill Simpson
- Lemonade by Beyonce'
- Purpose by Justin Bieber
- Views by Drake
Who should win? Yonce'
Who will win? Sturgill Simpson
Good lord. 2016 was an absolutely stacked year for albums and THIS is the list of five nominees they came up with? Beyonce' belongs here and I understand their infatuation with Adele but fucking Views? Seriously? Sturgill Simpson gets the "see, we still have credibility among critics!" nod and will probably win like Arcade Fire's The Suburbs at the beginning of the decade. The Bieber album seems like it happened years ago but, it is a very good album from a guy who nobody wanted to like due to past transgressions and the 180 that society has done on this guy's music should not go unnoticed. There is no way Drake (seriously? VIEWS?!) or Bieber get rewarded as both have publicly announced their intentions to skip the show as they do not feel the awards accurately represent the year in music.
Song of the Year
- "Formation" by Beyonce'
- "Hello" by Adele
- "I Took A Pill In Ibiza" by Mike Posner
- "Love Yourself" by Justin Bieber
- "7 Years" by Lukas Graham
Who should win? "Formation" and it's not close
Who will win? Lukas Graham.
The Song of the Year award typically goes to a foreign act with a "deep" song that tugs at the heartstrings of corny people. "7 Years" was created specifically to cater to that crowd. Adele is a strong candidate here as well because she's Adele but with how eager and try-hard the nominations were this year, I would not put it past the voters to reward Danish pop band Lukas Graham despite their odds at having any staying power being quite low in comparison to established acts in their primes like Adele and the deserving victor, Beyonce'. They can get away with it this year though because Kanye won't be there.
Best New Artist
And the nominees are...
- Anderson .Paak
- Chance The Rapper
- Kelsea Ballerini
- Maren Morris
- The Chainsmokers
Who should win? Chance The Rapper
Who will win? The Chainsmokers
Oh yeah, this one will start some riots. Maren Morris and Kelsea Ballerini will split the country vote and unfortunately, there is a chance that Paak and Chance split the critically-acclaimed upbeat rapper vote. Those two factions create an open path to the worst dimension where bro-est of the bros DJ duo The Chainsmokers are determined as the world's Best New Artist. They will get votes because I'm certain that some people just look at the Billboard charts, see "Closer", "Don't Let Me Down" and "#Selfie" and decide that "hey, this is what America wants" when instead, it will unleash a rolling ball of criticism that the Grammy Awards might not be able to recover from in the social/streaming media era.
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| Drew Taggart and Alex Pall (AKA: The Chainsmokers), would be the first DJ duo to ever win Best New Artist. |
Best Pop Solo Performance
And the nominees are...
- "Dangerous Woman" by Ariana Grande
- "Hello" by Adele
- "Hold Up" by Beyonce'
- "Love Yourself" by Justin Bieber
- "Piece By Piece (Idol Version)" by Kelly Clarkson
Who should win? Beyonce'
Who will win? Adele
The Grammy's fascination with Kelly Clarkson needs to be explained to me because she has not made a nominateable song in ten years and it's been fifteen years since everyone felt like they knew her personally because of her run on the extinct American Idol series. This category is typically much more separate from the rest of the show but, this year Best Pop Solo Performance shares three nominations with the Song/Record of the Year categories. It's obviously another case of Adele vs. Beyonce' and with Adele's vocal range, any award is within grasp.
Best Pop Duo/Group Performance
And the nominees are...
- "Cheap Thrills" by Sia ft. Sean Paul
- "Closer" by The Chainsmokers ft. Halsey
- "7 Years" by Lukas Graham
- "Stressed Out" by Twentyone Pilots
- "Work" by Rihanna ft. Drake
Who should win? "Cheap Thrills"
Who will win? "7 Years"
An unusually weak category, I have zero interest in which duo wins this award. "Work" is the most overrated and overplayed Rihanna song in a year where Drake regressed and none of that is deserving of as many nominations as this song received. "Stressed Out" is fine but doesn't seem like an award-winning song, even in a category filled with those types of songs. Lukas Graham will win by default.
Best Pop Vocal Album
And the nominees are...
- 25 by Adele
- Confident by Demi Lovato
- Dangerous Woman by Ariana Grande
- Purpose by Justin Bieber
- This Is Acting by Sia
Who should win? Adele
Who will win? Adele
Best Rock Performance
And the nominees are...
- "Blackstar" by David Bowie
- "Don't Hurt Yourself" by Beyonce' ft. Jack White
- "Heathens" by Twentyone Pilots
- "Joe (live from Austin City Limits)" by Alabama Shakes
- "The Sound Of Silence (live on Conan)" by Disturbed
Who should win? "Blackstar"
Who will win? "Blackstar"
If you thought that the entire evening could go on without the late David Bowie winning a single award, think again. This should be an extremely easy win for Bowie because what the fuck even is this list of nominees? Two live performances? The Song from the wildly disappointing Suicide Squad movie? Beyonce'? This has to be the most bizarre list of rock performances ever and that's not to say anything bad about the nominees. Lorde's nomination three years ago was an oddity but really, TWO live performances? Why?
Best Alternative Music Album
And the nominees are...
- 22, A Million by Bon Iver
- A Moon Shaped Pool by Radiohead
- Blackstar by David Bowie
- Post Pop Depression by Iggy Pop
- The Hope Six Demolition Project by PJ Harvey
Who should win? Bon Iver or Radiohead
Who will win? Bowie
There is absolutely nothing wrong with giving Blackstar as many Grammys as possible because of the immaculate timing in which it was released and the subject matter/influences of the album. I just happen to believe that Radiohead and Bon Iver's slightly longer (in terms of track totals, not actual length) albums were better and that's a totally fine stance to have when every album here is legitimate and has a strong artistic value with how bold and unique each one of them are. Grammy Awards that come down to personal preference are way more fun than the awards that are given to the abomination that is Meghan Trainor's first album instead of literally any other Best Artist nominee last year when those two should never have been involved in the same discussion. I'm not bitter at all, can't you tell?
Best Urban Contemporary Album
And the nominees are...
- Anti by Rihanna
- Lemonade by Beyonce'
- Malibu by Anderson .Paak
- Ology by Gallant
- We Are King by KING
Who should win? Beyonce'
Who will win? Beyonce'
Nobody knows what this category is but quick hint, it's not about the music. Hot takes aside, this is quite an interesting grouping of pop/hip hop/R&B influenced acts including one of the most exciting new performers in music in Gallant. It's a shame that this man is not scheduled to perform this Sunday because as much as ABC advertises "Grammy moments", his voice and energetic stage presence would steal the entire night and be the definition of a Grammy moment. Anderson .Paak is actually scheduled to perform and has an outside chance at Best New Artist. With all of that said, the voters are not dumb enough to give this award to anything other than Lemonade.
Best Rap Performance
And the nominees are...
- "All The Way Up" by Fat Joe & Remy Ma ft. French Montana and Infrared
- "No Problem" by Chance The Rapper ft. Lil' Wayne and 2 Chainz
- "Panda" by Desiigner
- "Pop Style" by Drake ft. The Throne
- "That Part" by Schoolboy Q ft. Kanye West
Who should win? Chance
Who will win? Desiigner
This is the weakest grouping of rap performances to have been nominated for this award. I'm not in love with any of the songs nominated here but, Chance deserves at least one trophy before the end of the night and if it has to be "No Problem" that wins him the accolade then, so be it. Realistically, "Panda" will win due to it's excessive chart domination when no other nominee made Billboard's top ten.
Best Rap/Sung Collaboration
And the nominees are...
- "Broccoli" by D.R.A.M. ft. Lil' Yachty
- "Famous" by Kanye West ft. Rihanna
- "Freedom" by Beyonce' ft. Kendrick Lamar
- "Hotline Bling" by Drake
- "Ultralight Beam" by Kanye West ft. Chance The Rapper, The-Dream, Kelly Price and Kirk Franklin.
Who should win? "Ultralight Beam"
Who will win? "Freedom"
A wildly unpredictable category, the rap/sung collaboration award is never handed out on national television but, always has an exciting list of selections that would incite some quality debates if anyone besides me gave a shit about it. "Ultralight Beam" may have been the #1 non-single released in 2016. "Freedom" stars 9-time 2017 nominee Beyonce' and 11-time 2016 nominee/5-time winner Kendrick Lamar so, the scent of a winner is strong with this one. The dark horse (not really) winner here is "Hotline Bling", a song heavily influenced by (to the point of ripping off) fellow nominee D.R.A.M.. Drake's defining song came out JUST after last year's cut-off date and with it's extreme takeover of both the charts and the internet, "Bling" has just as much of a valid case for the trophy as Yeezy and B. Shout out to D.R.A.M., who is such an easy dude to root for but, will only win this award if the most popular artists cancel out each other's votes. "Famous" is a little bit overrated due to the controversial music video but, it does manage to give The Life Of Pablo two nominations in the same category which is great because that is still a great album.
Best Rap Album
And the nominees are...
- and the Anonymous Nobody... by De La Soul
- Blank Face LP by Schoolboy Q
- Coloring Book by Chance The Rapper
- Major Key by DJ Khaled
- The Life Of Pablo by Kanye West
- Views by Drake
Who should win? Chance or Kanye
Who will win? Drake
Views is the only album in this category nominated for Album of the Year and had it's entire track list chart on the Hot 100 the week it debuted. It is an amazingly boring album and it will win this award because life is not fair. Chance has an outside shot at winning due to his surging wave of hype forcing the Grammys to reconsider their stance on mixtapes as albums.
Thus concludes my annual Grammy Awards preview. Hopefully, I am wrong about some of the winners but in a year where the obvious Album of the Year contender (Bowie) can't get a nomination over fucking Drake's weakest album, the possibilities are endless.
The Grammy Awards take place at 8 PM ET on CBS on Sunday, February 12th.
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