Wisconsin Rapids Bro League
Our tenth official season of blaming Cole Walters for spilling half of my pre-work sandwich all over myself.
Bro...
Apparently there are two throws that Aaron Rodgers can still make, the Hail Mary and the one where he throws his teammates under the bus. The NFL trade deadline might be three weeks away but, that has not stopped the overreaction masterclass happening at the Jets' headquarters. Any normal 2-4 team is either resigning themselves to a dismal season of ups-and-downs with hopes of an outside chance at a wildcard spot (picture the Saints) or they're selling high on veterans that don't need or want to work as hard carrying a team across an underwhelming finish line (oh hi, Raiders). Not the Jets though! No, this team has to push to succeed immediately with the New York Liberty a victory away from their first WNBA championship and both the Yankees and Mets one round away from a Subway Series World Series. With the Giants in their tenth consecutive rebuilding season, owner Woody Johnson has to grab the bull by the horns so that this streak of Big Apple success stories doesn't leave him in the dust, looking as foolish as so many of the past five decades worth of Jet teams has. I respect trading for Davante Adams when the Mike Williams signing has predictably gone abysmal so far and Robert Saleh had enough time to build more of a winning culture than he had. I just don't see why it took them losing two-thirds of the first third of the season to actually pull these triggers. Aren't these just older versions of the same Rodgers-Adams battery that went 8-9 three years ago in Green Bay? Good luck to promoted play-caller Todd Downing because we all know that from here on out, all positive results will be attributed to the future Hall of Fame quarterback and the blame game is only one loss away for anybody not wearing #8. Brian Gutekunst might be a genius.
Considering we are a third of the way through the NFL season, I think it'd be a fun experiment to see how the first round compares to the top eight scorers so far this season (in WRBL totals of course) and see if there is some sort of trend to take away from six weeks of Brett supremacy...
2024 WRBL 1st round
#1. Sparky - WR Justin Jefferson (WR6 in scoring so far, has had bye week)
#2. Andy - RB Bijan Robinson (RB6, no bye)
#3. Nick - RB Christian McCaffrey (N/A)
#4. Gabe - WR CeeDee Lamb (WR7, no bye)
#5. Alec - WR Tyreek Hill (WR13)
#6. Brett - WR Amon-Ra St. Brown (WR12)
#7. Hoefs - WR Ja'Marr Chase (WR1, no bye)
#8. Cole - RB Saquon Barkley (RB3)
Top 8 Scoring Players (regardless of position)
#1. QB Lamar Jackson (143.46, Brett's keeper)
#2. RB Alvin Kamara (136.6, 4th rd./pick #32)
#3. RB Derrick Henry (124.7, 3rd/#19)
#4. WR Ja'Marr Chase (120.5, 1st/#7)
#5. QB Josh Allen (118.2, 2nd/#14)
#6. WR Nico Collins (106.7, 3rd/#18)
#7. RB Saquon Barkley (105.4, 1st/#8)
#8. WR Drake London (104.8, 4th/#27)
My biggest takeaway is that after a very rough start to the season, quarterbacks were massively undervalued. I say this as a pretty massive blanket statement that really only applies to three or four players... Lamar Jackson, Josh Allen, Jordan Love? and the streaming QB. The reason we "undervalue" the most valued position in the sport is that naturally they should score the most points because they touch the ball on every play. I have no idea why modern fantasy leagues decided to take two points (from 6 to 4) off of touchdown passes but, it's really warped the way fantasy football gets played. Picture if you will for a moment, how the draft might have looked had touchdown passes counted for 6. There's a whole lot of over-drafting at that position in that universe and we might not have seen somebody like WR Amon-Ra St. Brown taken until the 3rd round because hell, I might have just taken a two quarterback combo of Mahomes and Love and reaped the consequences later. Instead, we check the waiver wire to see if the Jaguars opponent is out there and ride at dawn!
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Nancy Lane/Boston Herald
If rookie QB Drake Maye (above) has a performance like other rookie QB Caleb Williams did last week, we can officially declare "Jaguars opposing QB" as a top-five option for the rest of the season. |
Also, I'd be just as okay with Christian McCaffrey returning as Nick would right about now. The 49ers just don't feel the same while Kansas City tries grabbing stray glimpses of hope through the late-2010s time capsule and weirdly succeeding. How much each team has changed since last season's overtime Super Bowl will be on display for the nation as the 3:25 PM FOX game. Kansas City has brought back RB Kareem Hunt, WR Juju Smith-Schuster and even TE Jody Fortson to rave reviews under small sample sizes versus lesser opponents. Can these guys work out long-term? Can San Francisco keep performing with WR Brandon Aiyuk on pace for zero touchdowns, S Talanoa Hufanga on IR and RB Jordan Mason being less of a stretchable pass-catcher than McCaffrey? No matter the result, it feels like the loser is on pace to make a reactionary move before this year's trade deadline. Keep your eyes on people like WR Christian Kirk, S Jamal Adams and maybe even a Travis Etienne-type if Dallas doesn't pounce on the RB market first.
In the Bro League, Nick was sure to put away Gabe after the first half of Monday Night Football looked like Josh Allen making his MVP case until whatever that second half was. Now, Gabe's Orcas have a new outlook on this 2024 season while Tua Lipa has to prove that his 3-1 start was more than just an "Illusion" against the WRBL's other main character QB Lamar Jackson and Brett's Caleb Williams Nail Polish. Brett's team is now the top dog at 5-1 after squeaking out a win over league-wide punching bag Alec Swanson. In the words of the late Tampa Bay head coach John McKay, how does Alec feel about his team's execution? "I'm in favor of it". With the 'Boys and Alec's Bears on bye, he'll need his team living because there will be less going on to distract him this weekend and I'd be worried if I were Cole. It's hard to get a handle on the 96ers with Garrett Wilson now Rodgers' #2 target, Etienne nursing a hammy and Love certainly not a lock to throw four touchdowns every week... right? This week was one of Cole's finest as he handed Sparky a second consecutive loss behind Love torching the Cardinals and WR Chris Godwin putting up 35.5 last week with Mike Evans getting his twice annual Marshon Lattimore vacation. Sparky will be sure to remember this Nett Division tiebreaker come the week 13 rematch because outside of the 5-point swing provided by benching RB Najee Harris for WR Courtland Sutton in the FLEX spot, there wasn't a single mistake or wrongdoing in the Dad Weights and Protein Shakes lineup, Cole just 96'ed that ass (-pause-). 4-2 Sparky has a chance to fall even further after winning four out of the gate with a third loss extremely possible versus the 3-3 Van Buren Boys, still our league's highest scorer through six weeks. Nathaniel suffered a third straight loss in part due to RB James Cook's surprise scratch from the MNF game but mostly due to T-o-d-d Todd To Go's best showing of the season so far. My team's breakout (fluke?) performance was mostly due to actually taking some chances with the lineup this week. Chances like benching Mike Evans and claiming Giants WR Wan'Dale Robinson, a double-digit scorer (literally just 10 points exact) with early ROTY favorite Malik Nabers out with a concussion. Replacing Jared Goff for my team on his bye week was other ROTY candidate, QB Caleb Williams dropping a season-high 28.64 overseas versus the Jags. Pretty sure they're called the Jags because they are a team of "Just Another Guys". Most kickers are just "guys" out there until they start dropping 19 points as Lions rookie Jake Bates did for me this week. I've been sticking by his side considering FIFTEEN of his 18 games this season will be played indoors and I like the odds for him missing fewer kicks for negative fantasy points. Can't have any Chris Olaves on the roster.
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AP Photo/Michael Conroy
Get well soon, Chris Olave. The Saint and Electric Orca WR suffered a concussion immediately upon the impact of his one catch that he fumbled away for a Buccaneer defensive touchdown. |
Another solid Sunday featuring potentially sixteen hours worth of gameplay will be preceded by the Broncos playing the Saints in a snoozer at NOLA. I admit that I was too quick to be so pessimistic on Bo Nix's potential as an NFL quarterback. I'm still out on this Denver team but the future can become very bright with a TNF victory, an offseason signing at wideout (Stefon Diggs?) and by drafting Heisman favorite and Boise State Bronco RB Ashton Jeanty to take some pressure off Nix moving forward. That might be a "national" game but I believe more eyes will be focused and able to stay awake through Sunday morning's Jags-Pats showdown in foggy London-town. I already mentioned Sunday's biggest game (the Chiefs-Niners rematch) but the noon-ers are pretty tight as well with an NFC North battle that could determine who the division favorites are moving forward with the Vikings hosting the Lions. That division is so good right now that all four teams make up the top four teams in point differential in the NFL after week 5 and while that game will be a wash for point differential purposes, the Packers must defend their flyover state supremacy at home against the 5-1 Houston Texans. They might not be ready for such a strong challenger but, at least they don't have to play a defense as airtight as Pittsburgh's. Former Packer QB Aaron Rodgers wishes he were that lucky and instead will have to lead his new-look offense into Pittsburgh to face RUSSELL WILSON? and T.J. Watt and Keeanu Benton among other former Wisconsin Badgers. I have no idea how that game will play out and that excites me more than the prospect of what the Jets next move will be if they fall to 2-5. For some reason there's an ESPN+ game on MNF one hour after the Ravens and Buccaneers kick off the REAL Monday nighter. I'm fascinated to see what the ratings will be for Cardinals vs. Chargers. The NFL's least successful franchise historically against a team with no home fan base. Scintillating streaming television, job well done Roger!
Official WRBL Standings
Steven Nett Division
Colieveland 96ers (Cole Walters) 4-2 W2 (768.36)
Dad Weights and Protein Shakes (Jaime Sparkes) 4-2 L2 (775.86)
The Van Buren Boys (Nathaniel Hoefs) 3-3 L1 (838.32)
Stoltzya's Electric Orcas (Gabe Stoltz) 2-4 W1 (653.16)
Shooter McGavin Division
Caleb Williams Nail Polish (Brett Weinfurter) 5-1 W5 (797.74)
Tua Lipa (Nick Zurawski) 3-3 L2 (715.9)
T-o-d-d Todd To Go (Andy Todd) 2-4 W1 (750.46)
Tax Paying Homeowner (Alec Swanson) 1-5 L1 (616.36)
Week Six Final Scores
GABE defeats NICK 106.16-104.5
BRETT defeats ALEC 133.02-130.5
COLE defeats SPARKY 153.82-133.56
ANDY defeats HOEFS 159.94-119.72
Heroes of the Week: WR Chris Godwin (35.5, Cole), QB Caleb Williams (28.64, Andy), QB Jordan Love (25.62, Cole)
Waiver Wonders: RB Sean Tucker (34.2), QB Baker Mayfield (25.9), TE Cole Kmet (24)
Benchwarmers of the Week: RB Joe Mixon (27.2, Cole), QB Jared Goff (25.1, Andy), WR Keenan Allen (21.1, Nick)
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Matthew Hinton-Imagn Images
Waiver Wonder: RB Sean Tucker (14-136-1 on the ground, 3-52-1 in the air) |
Upcoming Week 7 Schedule for both WRBL and NFL (in CST)
Hoefs v. Sparky
Nick v. Brett
Gabe v. Andy
Cole v. Alec
Thursday @ 7:15 PM: Denver @ New Orleans
SUNDAY MORNING IN LONDON @ 8:30 AM: New England vs. Jacksonville
Sunday @ NOON: Detroit @ Minnesota (QUADBOX)
Tennessee @ Buffalo
Miami @ Indianapolis
Seattle @ Atlanta (QUADBOX)
Houston @ Green Bay (QUADBOX)
Cincinnati @ Cleveland
Philadelphia @ NY Giants (QUADBOX)
Sunday @ 3:05 PM: Las Vegas @ LA Rams
Carolina @ Washington
Sunday @ 3:25 PM: Kansas City @ San Francisco
Sunday @ 7:20 PM: NY Jets @ Pittsburgh
Monday @ 7:15 PM: Baltimore @ Tampa Bay
Monday @ 8 PM: LA Chargers @ Arizona
BYE WEEKS: Dallas Cowboys and Chicago Bears
Scoring Leaders
QB
Lamar Jackson 143.46 (Brett)
Josh Allen 118.2 (Nick)
Jalen Hurts 89.36 (Gabe)
Joe Burrow 87.02 (Hoefs)
Brock Purdy 76.08 (Alec)
Jayden Daniels 64.7 (Sparky)
Jordan Love 57.98 (Cole)
Caleb Williams 52.2 (Andy)
Aaron Rodgers 47.78 (Cole)
Patrick Mahomes 44.46 (Sparky)
Jared Goff 41.74 (Andy)
C.J. Stroud 37.8 (Hoefs)
Tua Tagovailoa 24.12 (Andy)
Kyler Murray 24.1 (Gabe)
Derek Carr 7.98 (Alec)
RB
Alvin Kamara 136.6 (Sparky)
Derrick Henry 124.7 (Nick)
Saquon Barkley 105.4 (Cole)
Kyren Williams 97.1 (Alec)
Breece Hall 93.4 (Andy)
Bijan Robinson 93.3 (Andy)
Jordan Mason 92.4 (Nick)
D'Andre Swift 90.8 (Brett)
James Cook 84.2 (Hoefs)
Jahmyr Gibbs 83.2 (Gabe)
James Conner 81.1 (Brett)
Aaron Jones 78.7 (Sparky)
Jonathan Taylor 72.6 (Nick)
Travis Etienne 58.2 (Cole)
Chuba Hubbard 54.9 (Sparky)
Kenneth Walker 54.4 (Hoefs)
Josh Jacobs 53.9 (Alec)
De'Von Achane 46.9 (Hoefs)
Brian Robinson Jr. 44.8 (Gabe)
Tony Pollard 36.6 (Cole)
Joe Mixon 34.8 (Cole)
Isiah Pacheco 31.9 (Gabe)
J.K. Dobbins 27.4 (Alec)
Rachaad White 26.2 (Nick)
Rhamondre Stevenson 25.5 (Alec)
Tyrone Tracy Jr. 22.7 (Gabe)
Kareem Hunt 18.7 (Gabe)
Zack Moss 17.8 (Hoefs)
Jerome Ford 17.4 (Hoefs)
Cam Akers 12.7 (Cole)
Najee Harris 8.9 (Sparky)
Javonte Williams 4.6 (Andy)
Ty Johnson 3.4 (Hoefs)
WR
Ja'Marr Chase 120.5 (Hoefs)
Nico Collins 106.7 (Andy)
Drake London 104.8 (Brett)
Chris Godwin 102 (Cole)
Garrett Wilson 97.4 (Cole)
Justin Jefferson 95 (Sparky)
CeeDee Lamb 92.4 (Gabe)
Malik Nabers 91.6 (Hoefs)
Mike Evans 80.6 (Andy)
D.J. Moore 71.2 (Nick)
Marvin Harrison Jr. 68.9 (Brett)
Amon-Ra St. Brown 68.48 (Brett)
Tyreek Hill 60.7 (Alec)
Deebo Samuel 60.4 (Andy)
Chris Olave 55.7 (Gabe)
DK Metcalf 51.1 (Alec)
Stefon Diggs 48.1 (Gabe)
A.J. Brown 46.5 (Hoefs)
Jayden Reed 46 (Sparky)
Davante Adams 44.9 (Sparky)
Zay Flowers 41.4 (Brett)
Cooper Kupp 39.7 (Nick)
Brandon Aiyuk 38.2 (Cole)
Amari Cooper 29.3 (Nick)
Rashee Rice 29.1 (Andy)
Diontae Johnson 25.7 (Gabe)
Terry McLaurin 23.3 (Hoefs)
Tank Dell 21 (Alec)
Jameson Williams 18.9 (Alec)
Jaylen Waddle 16.2 (Cole)
Courtland Sutton 15.3 (Sparky)
DeVonta Smith 14.9 (Gabe)
Tee Higgins 14.7 (Sparky)
Jaxon Smith-Njigba 13.1 (Alec)
Xavier Worthy 11.8 (Hoefs)
Wan'Dale Robinson 10 (Andy)
Rashid Shaheed 8.3 (Nick)
Puka Nacua 8.2 (Alec)
Michael Pittman Jr. 7.1 (Alec)
Rome Odunze 2 (Sparky)
TE
George Kittle 71.8 (Brett)
Kyle Pitts 50.3 (Alec)
Dalton Kincaid 48.7 (Sparky)
Brock Bowers 47.1 (Cole)
Dallas Goedert 47 (Hoefs)
Travis Kelce 46.9 (Andy)
Sam LaPorta 38.9 (Nick)
Tucker Kraft 28.3 (Hoefs)
Trey McBride 17.6 (Andy)
Jake Ferguson 17.1 (Gabe)
Mark Andrews 12.5 (Gabe)
Tyler Conklin 11.5 (Cole)
David Njoku 10.8 (Hoefs/Nick)
Isaiah Likely 5 (Brett)
Evan Engram 1.5 (Cole)
K
Brandon Aubrey 80 (Brett)
Ka'imi Fairbairn 70 (Hoefs)
Jake Moody 57 (Cole)
Justin Tucker 53 (Alec)
Evan McPherson 51 (Nick)
Harrison Butker 49 (Sparky)
Jake Bates 45 (Andy)
Younghoe Koo 27 (Gabe)
Jake Elliott 19 (Gabe)
Chris Boswell 17 (Sparky)
Cam Little 4 (Cole)
Blake Grupe 1 (Andy)
DF
San Francisco 49ers 55 (Sparky)
Cleveland Browns 42 (Brett)
New York Jets 42 (Hoefs)
Pittsburgh Steelers 42 (Andy)
Chicago Bears 34 (Alec)
Dallas Cowboys 26 (Gabe)
Tampa Bay Buccaneers 19 (Cole)
New England Patriots 13 (Cole)
New Orleans Saints 13 (Nick)
Los Angeles Chargers 12 (Nick)
Baltimore Ravens 11 (Alec)
Las Vegas Raiders 10 (Nick)
Miami Dolphins 8 (Cole)
Philadelphia Eagles 6 (Nick)
Cincinnati Bengals 2 (Andy)
Hypothetical Standings (Top 4 scorers win, bottom 4 lose, no divisions)
Brett 4-2
Sparky 4-2
Cole 4-2
Andy 4-2
Hoefs 3-3
Nick 3-3
Gabe 1-5
Alec 1-5
